Okay, so it has been a while since I have raged about this school. A few things have obviously happened since my latest post. From Jan until about May, there were zero issues with the school. I was relieved. Yes, we still had problems where we would pick her up and she would be "mia". I would have to leave the pick-up line to park my car, and go search for her inside the school. But, you know what? It's no biggie. As long as the bullying has died down, the teacher isn't discussing sex with her students, and she's fairly okay there...who gives a shit right?
Not so....I had to fight for those days to be taken off of her record. To this day, they are still listed as "unexcused". Peachy, right? Whatever, she is OUT of that hell hole! Here is the letter that I wrote to the school district. My attorney proof-read it and forwarded it for me. Please do NOT question my motives, as this latest attack on my family was the final fucking straw. No, we are NOT suing the school. We are aiming at the school changing it's policies. If it happened to us, then it will happen to someone else!!! I can also 100% PROVE everything that is written in this letter.
This letter is EXACTLY what has happened at this school. I'm pretty sure that you'll realize how much this school NEEDS to change before something else happens at it.
Names to know:
Chris = Uncle
Kenzie = Daughter
Ms Jackie = ISS Teacher
Ms Kitt = Secretary
Guyman = Principal
To Whom It May Concern:
We are a military family, and live in Logan, Utah. My husband attended West Point and is an officer in the US Army. He has been in the military for over 10 years. We liked the community here and decided to buy a house. I wanted to finally root my family down to a great place with great people, and Logan seemed to be the perfect place to do that. I enrolled my daughter into the local elementary school for kindergarten, even though she has never attended school before now. There have been problems nonstop from Woodruff Elementary. Please keep in mind, that I might not be absolute on the dates. I hand wrote all my dates as a list, and some of the days are hard to read. Also, this will be very long and I hope you have the patience to read through my entire letter.
I am not a typical mom, and tend to stick out like a sore thumb. I stand up for my daughter and will fight to the death for her. I feel that this has managed to rub people the wrong way, unintentionally. I am also not the typical LDS girl. I am probably more outspoken about my opinions then I should be. Plus, when angry or sometimes unintentionally, I curse. I'm from Jersey, and have lived in many different places. Cursing has become second nature to me. They are just words, but apparently the cursing makes a lot of people angry here, and honestly, this is a first for me. I've never seen so many people get so angry over cursing before, or so judgemental. I never curse in front of other people's children, as I feel that would be wrong to do.
My husband (Jeff) was relocated to Fort Hood, TX to start a brand new transportation company out there. My brother (Chris) offered to help with the family. He quickly moved in with us and has been a blessing ever since. I have surgery every month and he is a wonderful help. When I cannot get out of bed to help with the children, he is instantly on it. If there is a problem with the kids, he informs me immediately and I handle it myself. He is wonderful with the children and has been great helping me around the house. You'd be surprised how excited he gets over cooking for the family. It is amazing how much he has done for our small little family, with barely a complaint about it. The girls and I call him our big cuddly bear.
My daughter was diagnosed with separation anxiety disorder and has been known to be in hysterics for hours after a "traumatic event". This is not uncommon for military children, whom have noticed a parent (or two) flitting in and out of their lives. To my daughter's knowledge, Daddy is at work, but it has cut much deeper with her. She has issues being left in the car while I get gas. She can SEE me, but she acts like she has been left alone for hours and panics. After school, even the time it takes me to open her car door is a lifetime for her. It is always a rush, and she is always crying. She acts like I have left her in the car for hours, by herself, even though it has only been a matter of seconds.
When my daughter is left alone with myself and any other adult she doesn't "know" (according to her), she will also have hysterics for hours afterwards even if she acts alright during the situation. She also acts like I wasn't even in the room with her. She fixates on the "strangers", and becomes completely overwhelmed in her fear. Sometimes, I think she is handling the situation admirably but when we get home she is in tears. She also goes so far as to say I wasn't even in the room with her, even though I was sitting right next to her. This is how bad her fear is.
So far, I have noticed that she has gotten to "know" only a handful of adults. It depends on the amount of time she has been around these adults before she becomes attached to them. Once attached, she is golden, but the problem lies in her not recognizing other adults she has spoken with and talked to numerous times. These people would be her speech teacher, her kindergarten teacher, her kindergarten teacher's aid, Kegan's mom (Mrs. Weeks), my husband, my brother and myself. I have to be very careful whom I let my daughter be around and how many "strangers" are there. If there is even one stranger, she will go into flight or fright response. Usually, it is a fright response but on the rare occasion she does attempt to run it is just her instincts kicking in. Sadly, this also applies to family she has known most of her life (grandparents, uncles, etc). To my knowledge, she is terrified of the principal and the new level 3 student teacher. I hear blips about other adults, but I have no idea whom she is referring to.
Likewise, my daughter is terrified of showers because she doesn't like being in an enclosed space without someone she knows around. Therefore, she always has baths with her sister and has taken to them like a fish. Playing outside in the yard without myself or my brother sitting there watching her is hell on earth. It is a rare event that I can get her outside in our fenced yard without her screeching down the neighborhood, even if I am standing by the door watching her. I was hoping that her attending school would help to waylay these fears, but it has only caused even more problems for her in some aspects.
When my daughter was enrolled in the school, I got the looks/comments of "single parent" and a couple about my husband being military. There were even comments about our income being really low and how I should sign her up for free school lunches. Mind you, I have never disclosed our income to the school nor asked for assistance. To my recollection I was questioned and spoken to about this at least four times BEFORE school even started. My daughter doesn't even eat lunch at school this year, so I am not sure as to why this was brought up numerous times to me. Obviously, I took it all in stride and just thought the comments were a little off the wall, but there was still well-meaning behind them.
Before even the school year started, the secretary Ms. Kit kept losing my daughter's paperwork. I filled out all of the necessary paperwork at least five times before she was even attending the school. After the school year started, I was getting the same exact paperwork home in her backpack everyday for the first month. I have pretty much memorized those forms by now, that is how many times I had to fill it out. Once again, I brushed it off as them being disorganized and continued to do my part to make sure everything was in order. Eventually, I had to walk into the school myself and hand it in myself. This stopped the forms coming home with my daughter.
Her attending this school was a great experience originally, but then we started noticing problems. My daughter was being bullied, a lot. My daughter was wetting the bed by mid-September and refusing to attend school every day. I had never heard of children being bullied this young so I wasn't sure if this was because of her condition. At first, I didn't think my daughter was telling the truth and so I continued to be supportive while still enforcing her attending school. However, it continued to get worse for her there and the stories she kept telling me were too crazy NOT to be true.
When her first school field trip came up, my first instinct was that I wanted to be there for her and it would be a great way to see how she is acclimating to the school. On the bus to our location, the teacher sat completely seperated from the other adults and students. She was by herself, and the entire field trip she did nothing to help the other parents with the students. She didn't keep them entertained with silly songs on the bus, she didn't even really talk to the parents either. On the way back from our location, the teacher was sitting in front of me and I was sitting next to my daughter.
Five minutes into the trip home, I witnessed the bullying myself. One little girl (Rylee) was provoking another little boy (Kanyon) to spit on my daughter and pull her hair. There were also taunts of "we don't like people who wear orange" and "Kenzie always acts like a baby". This happened right in front of my face, and I stupidly blamed the boy doing the physical assaults.
After the field trip, I informed the teacher about what had happened and she handled it completely inappropriately. Instead of contacting his parents, or just speaking to the child about it, she dragged that poor boy in front of me. He was in tears, apologizing to me. Obviously, never having been in this situation before and with a child crying to me, I did the best thing I could do. I comforted him. I still feel awful about how this was handled. It was completely inappropriate and I am not even sure if his parents were ever informed that it did happen. He never bullied her again, but can you imagine how that poor boy felt? Horrible way to handle it.
I was also relieved, thinking the bullying had ended. It had not. I didn't realize that Rylee was actually behind the bullying until much later. Rylee's type of bullying was much more subtler. She is a verbal/emotional bully, with the occasional physical assaults. Stupidly, it took me a while to put two and two together. My daughter was happy to go to school for the next few days, but the bullying started up again and so did her complaints. Now, my daughter was coming home with stories about how a little girl keeps pulling her hair and pushing her on the "blue line". Kenzie was also making comments about how Rylee was refusing to let her look at certain things, or do certain things in the classroom because they are for "Rylee's friends only".
Before I can contact the school about the bullying again, my daughter is lost for two to three hours after school. We have a system in place with the school, that the teacher or the teacher's aid is supposed to wait with my daughter by the pick-up area on school grounds. So, on November 4th, my daughter is gone from school grounds. My brother went to pick her up from school and she was not waiting with the teacher where she was supposed to be. When my daughter wasn't in the specified location, he starts looking around for the teacher but never finds the teacher. The teacher's aid is not there either. They have left school grounds and now my daughter is missing.
Chris goes to the front office and questions Ms. Kit if she has seen Kenzie, as he cannot find her. Ms. Kit decides to start paging the school for my daughter, as the principal and other teachers check the bathrooms. My daughter would not know what the paging over the intercom means if she heard it. She has never been paged before and even if she hears it, she wouldn't know what to do. I feel that this is another reason why the school acted abominably. They have horrible procedures for lost students, even if their own policies outline what to do in that situation. Not one of their policies was followed that day.
About fourty-five minutes go by before I get a call from Christopher telling me that they cannot find Kenzie. Obviously, I am panicking and start walking to the school. We live fairly close by and only have one car. I figured if I started walking there - I could get there faster, and we could find her faster. Chris comes and picks me up halfway, and we go back to the school. I call my husband on the phone, and I'm pretty sure I was screaming at him about pedophiles. The principal walks up to me, while I'm outside talking to my husband, and tells me "Don't worry, we will find her." Principal Guyman then goes SLOWLY back into the school and disappears for half an hour.
I was five minutes off from calling the police and having a man hunt for my daughter. The principal comes back outside to where I am waiting and tells me that they have found her. I then need to take my ID to a bus stop across town and show it to a bus driver to get my daughter. Principal Guyman tells me we can hash out my complaints after I have picked her up. He gives me terrible directions to the bus stop, and we circle the area three times before we see the school bus.
The bus driver tells me that my daughter looks exactly like another little girl that gets onto the bus, and I introduce myself to the woman standing there with her child. That woman later turns out to be Kegan's mother, Mrs. Weeks. I grab my daughter and take her back to the school, but the principal is NOT there. He has lied to me about speaking about this and fixing it. I tell my husband we have found her and we take her home. She is in hysterics for weeks after this. She still worries about being lost again.
Later, Mrs. Weeks contacts me about what really happened that day. She informed me that there is only one white girl that gets on that bus and that girl looks nothing like my daughter. The other little girl is actually in 4th grade, and much older. She also informed me that my daughter got off the bus with Kegan and Mrs. Weeks knew immediately my daughter didn't belong there. Mrs. Weeks had to stop the bus driver from driving off. She told me that she tried to call the school nonstop, but the school never answered the phone. Mrs. Weeks had to convince the bus driver to contact his dispatch, to try to get a hold of the school.
This is how my daughter was "found". By another parent, not by the school. When my husband called the school the next day to speak with the principal, the principal straight up blamed my daughter for getting onto the bus in the first place. My husband was so angry that day talking to the principal, that he actually told the principal, "I have 200 soldiers under my command, if that were to happen on base...I would be discharged for actions unbecoming an officer." He has never apologized, her teacher has never apologized, and they ALL continue to twist the story around. If you ask Ms. Kitt (the secretary who likes to gossip) about what happened when she was lost, Ms. Kitt will tell you that my daughter was never lost. Those were the worst two to three hours of my life and to this day the school refuses to accept responsibility for what has happened. Can you imagine if that parent turned out to be a pedophile instead? I have never lost either of my children before this happened. I still find it hard to believe that six adults weren't doing their jobs that day, and they still continue to blame my child.
There is a police officer on school grounds, and this is why we never called the police. We assumed that the police already knew about what was happening. The police were never contacted about the situation, and to this day the school has refused to accept any responsibility or apologize about what has happened. In fact, Ms. Kitt and several other teachers have been doing their best to cover up what happened that day. If I go into the front office, no matter who is there, Ms. Kitt takes an extra effort to talk loudly and claim my daughter was never lost. She will do this in front of other teachers, students, parents and even small children not enrolled at the school.
I feel because there were so many strangers around her and she didn't know what to do; that she went to the safest place she knew. With the safest person she knew. This person happened to be Kegan, her best friend. So, she followed Kegan home because she was scared and didn't know what else to do. This is not as far fetched as some people at the school might think. This is exactly what her condition is. They have known since day one that she was diagnosed with this, and they refused to even care about her enough to make sure she safe. There is no excuse for what happened that day. You cannot blame a 5 year old for something like this, when the adults themselves didn't do their jobs.
Where were the teachers after school? Why were they not watching the kindergarten students in the pick-up line, like they do everyday? Well, the answer to that is simple: The teacher wanted to go home early, and abandoned the students. She was not to be found that entire day, and even afterwards never offered an apology. The reason these policies are in place is because of SAFETY issues. This teacher put her own needs before her students.
It would turn out later that not only did my daughter get on the bus herself in a panic-mode, but that another teacher from 2nd grade actually tried to put her on a PUBLIC bus (down the street) from the school. My daughter was the one that stopped the teacher was putting her on a public bus, and went with Keagan instead. It is a sad day when your child is being forced onto a public city bus after school, when we pick up my children from school EVERY SINGLE day. We never vary from this. Our children do NOT ride the bus, and the school knew this.
After this occurred, I contacted the teacher via emails, and informed her in detail about what was occurring with her homework, grades and the bullying. I wanted to pretty much discuss what had happened the day my daughter was missing, the bullying, and the fact that my daughter is learning absolutely nothing in school. Everything my daughter has learned, has actually been taught by me. It turns out that parents were actually testing my daughter and her homework was being graded by these same parents. The parents and teachers were also misspelling my daughter's name on every single piece of paper that came home with her. This is unprofessional and as soon as it was corrected, my daughter was receiving high grades. I was also able to point to her paperwork and say, "Here is your name". Whereas before she was saying these papers were not hers because that was not her name. Now, after changing somewhat how my daughter is being taught, my daughter is learning multiplication at home and is on a 1st grade level for most of her school subjects. It only took the teacher stepping up and actually teaching my child. But thus far, until yesterday actually, her teacher had no idea that my daughter knows how to read, do all shapes, write (and is starting cursive), and is so advanced in math. Also, the teacher would not let me take pictures of the class during their Halloween parade and said that she'd email the pictures she took later. I never receive these photos as they are "too blurry". This is a lost memory now.* (Later at the end of the school, they had a music program and SHOWED the Halloween pictures on the projection. Guess they weren't so blurry. I was lied to again!)
On November 18th, Kenzie comes home and tells me about how Rylee has been pushing her and poking her on the "blue line" (again). She also informs me about Kegan's black eye. I speak to Mrs. Weeks, and Mrs. Weeks informs me that Kegan has now become Kenzie's protector. Apparently Kenzie has been getting picked on so bad that Kegan, her best friend, had decided to defend her himself. He is a wonderful boy for doing that for her. However, it bodes the question, where are the teachers when all of this is happening? Why haven't they done anything about it when I have been a constant thorn, reminding them to handle it?
Through emails the teacher requested that I speak to her at school, or over the phone, about the bullying. I approached her with Mrs. Weeks, as Kegan Weeks was also being bullied by the same children. In fact on November 11th, Kegan got a black eye for defending Kenzie on the playground. When he informed a volunteer parent, the parent called him a liar. This is also unprofessional, as the teacher did not notice the black eye at all and some of the parents are unreliable with their bias. Was it a coincidence that the parent whom was informed of the bullying was Rylee's mother?
On November 21st, as we are telling Mrs. Schmidt about the bullying that has been happening with more detail (again), Kenzie and Kegan run up to us to tell us that Rylee has pushed Kenzie again. Rylee is behind them, and the smile on her face can only be described as evil. Mrs. Schmidt asks Rylee if she did push Kenzie, and Rylee admits to it. So Mrs. Schmidt takes Rylee to the ISS room with Ms. Jackie. It later turns out that Rylee was only punished for ten minutes total, and then allowed back into the classroom (without her parents being called again) for a party. Also, the teacher will later claim this was an "accident". All other types of bullying that I try to point out AFTER this, is instantly labelled as an accident. Nothing is officially done about the bullying, and it continues for months. There is also no apology nor responsibility taken for this, even though it happened right in front of the teacher.
December 15th, Kegan is beat up on the school bus. Kegan was sitting on the bus going to school, and he decided he wanted to look at a magnet that another student had brought to school. The other student didn't like that Kegan was looking it, so this same student decided to punch Kegan in the face a lot. Mrs. Weeks shows up and Kegan's nose is bleeding, amongst other things. When Mrs. Weeks speaks with the principal about it, I am told that the principal blamed Kegan for looking at the magnet and did not punish the other child for his actions. This seems to be the norm for the principal. Whenever there is bullying or anything wrong happens, the principal will do his best to shift the blame off either himself or the school. This is not how you handle a situation like this. The principal should have punished that student, instead of blaming the victim for looking at something. What kind of world is it that you cannot even look at something without being blamed for your own injuries?
That same day, I am scheduled for an emergency gallbladder removal. I am in the hospital, on heavy medication, and about to go under for my surgery. My brother gets a phone call from the school, and tells me that we need to leave the hospital immediately. I am unsure of what was exactly said on that phone call, Chris claims they would tell him nothing and the school claims they told him everything. I am tempted to believe my brother and not the school in this situation. They have a history of twisting and lying about things, so I don't exactly trust them. This is also the only time they ever have, or will in the future, call me. Obviously, it must be serious.
I sign myself out of the hospital, against my surgeon's wishes and make my way to the school. My daughter is standing outside of the school by herself, again. Why is she outside of school on the sidewalk waiting for me, by herself? This is a red flag for me, as that should never happened. I take her hand and walk into the school. I see Mrs. Schmidt, Mrs. Weeks, Kegan, and Ms. Jackie in a side room. I walk into the room with my daughter, and the first words out of my mouth are "What happened?". I am told that Kegan and Kenzie were in the computer lab, but Kenzie wanted to sit next to another student and Kegan didn't want her to. So, words were exchanged between the two and Kegan winds up punching my daughter in the face. My daughter does not have a mark on her. She's surprisingly okay, and very calm.
I'm calm as they are explaining this to me. I ask where the teacher was, when Kenzie and Kegan were fighting. The answer is just as shocking as finding out what happened. Apparently, the computer teacher was standing there the whole time the two children were fighting and she didn't intercede. Obviously, I point out how wrong that is to Ms. Jackie and Mrs. Schmidt. This could have been avoided. Ms. Jackie then has the nerve to tell me that "this is all about learning social cues." About now is when I snap. I won't lie, I called her something to the extent of a "fucking idiotic bitch."
This was the perfect storm for me. After everything that had happened with this school, with the bullying not being handled effectively, the refocus teacher trying to deny the school neglected my child, the principal denying any responsibility for losing my daughter...the list goes on. I am not trying to excuse what I said to her, however I feel it was completely justified. After putting my foot in my mouth, I tell my daughter I'm not sure if she'll be attending this school ever again.
Later, Mrs. Weeks informs me that Kegan was suspended for the rest of the day. I'm not sure if you noticed or not, but when Rylee was picking on Kenzie for months, the teachers and principal didn't step into the situation until it was done in front of their face. Also, Rylee was only punished for ten minutes and allowed back to a party. Kegan was suspended for a whole day. I feel like there is a system of favoritism with the punishment system in this school. Yes, he should have been punished...but so should the others.
I do wind up calling the school the next day to apologize. Ms. Kitt answers the phone and does not patch me through to Ms. Jackie or the principal. Instead, I am on the phone for forty-five minutes with her, while she lectures me about my cursing and how inappropriate it was of me. She even lectured me about how her supposed grandchildren don't curse, and I should not as well. I did not curse in front of any child besides my own and Kegan, and I didn't even do it loudly. I also only used two curse words, but apparently that is looked on very badly. Kegan's mom curses more then I do, and my daughter knows cursing isn't good. So, I'm thinking stop lecturing me about cursing. I am 30 years old. I am not a child. Eventually, I lose my patience and tell her I need to go. I hang up the phone and from then on every time Ms. Kitt sees me, she takes it as an opportunity to either inform me my daughter was never lost or to lecture me on cursing. Mind you, I don't even think Ms. Kitt was around when my daughter was lost. So, what right does she have to even mention it to me over and over again? She is just making matters worse the more she mentions it.
Ms. Kitt also does not care if there are other students, teachers or parents around when she decides she wants to lecture me. I have also tried from then on to make light of the situation, but that just opens the door for more hatred to be thrown at me. I can only think that if she is purposely stirring this up in front of my face, then what does she say behind my back? A lot of the adults at the school, including the principal, have made it absolutely clear that they dislike me because I curse. They also do not like that I refuse to change my speech patterns in front of them, just because they do not like it. You can't just change the way you talk, even if you're cursing unintentionally, when you've been speaking that way for over twenty years. It just doesn't work like that. Common sense is apparently not so common.
Anyways, my daughter goes on Christmas break and returns to school. The bullying has completely stopped by now. I feel this is not because of the school, but rather because Rylee and her cohorts grew bored of picking on my daughter. But, now I am more comfortable with sending my daughter to school. I am very excited about this, and am still happy that my daughter is finally enjoying school.
However, in the beginning of January, Mrs. Schmidt (Kenzie's teacher) finds out that she is pregnant and decides to inform her entire class that there is a baby in her tummy. I am not sure what is exactly said, as I was not there, and I also understand that she was really excited about being pregnant. However, my issue is that this is the age of "Why". I know a lot of questions were asked, and my daughter came home that day with even more questions. The teacher did not need to mention this to her class, at all. Highly unprofessional. You don't even want to know what kind of questions my daughter was asking me after this. The teacher also sent my daughter home with a worded message, "You can tell your mommy I am a parent now." What?! That is highly unprofessional too. I let this go though, as my daughter is really enjoying school. I do make mention of it to the principal the next day and list my concerns about it to him. Chris was there as well, and now the principal has straight out told me that I never spoke to him about all of our many issues.
Well, we are all thinking that everything has died down again. So, we go about our lives and keep sending my daughter to school. On March 26th, Chris goes to pick up Kenzie from school and she is not there. His first reaction is that she is lost again. We have received no phone call about this. Neither of us know where my daughter is, again. So he goes into the main office and Kenzie is shut in the principal's office. She is in her hysterics again. Principal Guyman, the level 3 student teacher, Mrs. Schmidt, and Kenzie are in there. The school knows about my daughter's diagnosis, and yet they are still refusing to adhere to it. We don't even know how long my daughter was in that office for, or for that matter what was asked/said. You have no idea what it is like to go through your child being lost not once, but twice. The second time wasn't for long, but the least the school could have done was to call me and let me know. Instead, they had my daughter in a room by herself with a lot of strangers and are interrogating her.
Chris walks in and the Principal tells him that Kenzie has said some concerning things at school today. From what we were told, Kenzie said something to the extent of, "I don't like cold showers." and "they leave me in the car". Now, if you speak Kenzie Language, you know what these statements mean. It means she hates showers and she panics when she thinks we have left her. This is not very hard to figure out, however all three adults involved instantly assumed this was a case of abuse. Chris tells me later that they were asking her a lot of leading questions, and that pretty much what she was saying was being twisted around to fit into their mold of logic. They also questioned him and were refusing to let her leave with him, because according to them "she is terrified to get in the car with you". Huh? They actually were threatening him with CPS for these comments, and if you check my daughter any day, she never has a mark on her. My daughter is NOT abused. It is fairly easy to figure that out.
Finally, he gets fed up and just takes her home with him. He's very angry, and tells me exactly what happened. So, I go back to the school with my daughter and straight into the principal's office. There is about a 5 minute delay between when Chris comes home and when I leave with her again, as I am trying to get the whole story from him. In the principal's office, it takes me two questions to get the truth from her. "Kenzie, when you write on your wall or hit your sister, what is your punishment?" "Time out." "Kenzie, where is your time out?" "The stairs." "Kenzie, how long is your time out?" "10 minutes." That is how long it takes me to get the truth out of her. Instead of listening to her answers, the principal then decides he wants to continue asking even more questions. These aren't even "How?" or "Why?", these are leading questions like: "When you are in the car, do you see your mom or not?" Which is obviously not a good question to ask a child with separation anxiety disorder, but my daughter said she could see me. I finally leave with Kenzie, and take her home. I am now angry as well. My daughter has still not calmed down about this. I let her attend school the next day simply because I knew she'd be even more upset if I didn't take her to school. I assume she was calm during school, as there were no comments to me about it.
I have a friend that works for CPS in Arizona. He has heard everything that has happened with this school, from day one. He is furious after hearing this. My friend informs me that in Arizona, and he is unsure if it is the same in Utah, but the school cannot question a child like that because the leading questions either will fill their head with things that did not happen. He also tells me that the school cannot question or detain my daughter like that either without a parent or a CPS worker there, because it can lead to secondary trauma. I am instantly concerned about this, as my daughter already has issues and I don't want anymore popping up.
The very next day, I walk into the school and I am talking to my daughter's speech teacher for an update. Her speech teacher is amazing, unlike her kindergarten teacher. The speech teacher has made amazing leaps with her. I am very happy with how Kenzie has become attached to her, and can be alone in the same room with her. I am happy that Kenzie is making such progress.
While I am there, I also asking Ms Jackie about speaking with a social worker, as per the advice of my CPS friend. I am looking for a social worker at the school, but apparently there is not one. Nor is there even an on call nurse, so Ms. Jackie tells me she is the best next thing. I pretty much apologize for cursing at her, and lay down what has been happening with the school. I also give her my long list of concerns and tell her that I am at a loss of what to do now. Which I still am. All the time while we are talking, the principal keeps popping his head in and interrupting our talk. He keeps asking me if I need to talk to him, but I keep saying no. After about the twentieth time he interrupted, I say "sure why not?" I pick up my daughter from her spot, where she is once again with a stranger (level 3 student teacher). I am not happy about this, but will handle it later.
I sit down with the principal again, my daughter is in the room too, whom I am absolutely sure hates me by now. I am still not very happy about what I have learned and what has happened. I inform him about the secondary trauma and that he does know about my daughter's condition. That my daughter was in hysterics all night about what happened, and that I have hired an attorney. I tell him that "I have a lot of respect for the school, and will not be suing the school system. However, I feel like your hatred towards me is being taken out on my child. I would also appreciate it if you are never alone with my daughter ever again. By alone, I mean just you or with any people she considers 'strangers'." That it was wrong not to even call me about this. I also tell him that if this happens again in the future, I'd prefer to be called or hey, you can call CPS because at least they will call me. He turns to me, and you can tell he hates me by now. He has this mean look on his face, and he says: "I will call CPS in the future if this happens again." Then he looks at his watch, gives me a sneer, and says, "Now, you have made me late for my next meeting." He leaves the room, and I take Kenzie home again. All that day, I am thinking he just threatened me. I still feel that way. This was all done in front of my child. My daughter was sitting there. I didn't respond to him because she was sitting there. I probably should have, however I was so taken aback by what he had said and I was thinking about my daughter. Now, I am happy I did not as it would give him an additional excuse to dislike me. This was very disrespectful.
The next day, I decide I'm going to bury the hatchet with her teacher. I have been calling her not so nice names at home, and felt rather guilty. I do apologize to her to her face for that. The hatchet is buried with the teacher, for now. I still feel like she isn't the best of teachers, but that is the risk you take when you enroll your child in school. I sit down with her and Ms. Jackie in Ms. Jackie's room. My main goal today is to inform them that Kenzie not learning much in her class, and maybe we can change up her curriculum a bit so that she is. We are talking about multiplication when the Teacher's Aid (Ms. Jessie) comes in. So, I take this as an opportunity to inform them both about how Kenzie is with people she deems 'strangers'. That while she might be fine at school, or in that moment, when she comes home she cries about it to me. As soon as I start mentioning this, the principal interrupts our conversation and takes a seat.
At this point, I am feeling bullied myself by this principal. I cannot have a conversation with anyone in that school without the principal stepping into the room and trying to bully me. I feel like he is on a power trip now, so I make sure to explain again that even if she knows someone in the room, to my daughter, it's almost as if she is alone with these people. It is not the same as you and me. The principal decides to interrupt our conversation and tell me that he wants this written out by her therapist that is three hours away on paper, and signed. So, now, a diagnosis that has been accepted all year...is no longer a diagnosis. He also tries to argue about why he cannot be alone with my daughter. After the other day where she was in hysterics, I feel like she should NEVER be alone with him again. He is a bully. But, I suck it up again and tell them that I am relocating her therapist from off Hill AFB to here in Logan. But, that when I switched her therapists I will make sure to get in writing on the therapist's own letterhead, with the therapist's signature...that this is her diagnosis. He finally leaves.
As I type this, this last event happened yesterday. I feel like there are certain people who have been poisoned by this principal or his secretary. I am unhappy with the way this school has been functioning. I know I have a big mouth, and tend to rub people the wrong way. However, the way that this principal and his staff have been running this school is completely unacceptable. For every one parent that is speaking up, there are dozens more that have gone through something similar. I feel that this principal is on a power trip and is a bully. No matter how annoying or how much you dislike a specific parent, you do not run your school this way. I also feel that the way things have been handled thus far, have been handled terribly. There is no reason for me to have to write this letter, if the school did their jobs correctly.
I would also like to add that I have contacted the superintendent so often about these these events, that he no longer answers my phone calls. It is obvious that the principal and the superintendent are doing their very best to cover up the bad things they have done to my family. I feel that the reason why they refuse to accept responsibility or even apologize to me, and even to attempt to bully me, is because they know they have done a lot of things wrong.
To this day, I cannot get a straight answer from the principal about many occurrences. To this day, I am still very angry with the school for the many mistakes they have made. In fact, I didn't even know I could home school, do choice school, or speak to the district until just yesterday. I had no idea these were my options, the school never informed me of this. I had to find out this from my attorney and from my friend yesterday. All the while, the school knew I could do this and didn't wish to inform me. Even when I was speaking with Ms. Jackie, she didn't inform me that I could do this!
I am angry that the bullying was never taken care of. I am angry that the school has never taken responsibility or apologized for losing my child. As a parent, that is your worst nightmare. The principal has never understood this. I will not be allowing my daughter to attend this school next year, and I have informed her teacher of this. I am considering not allowing her to attend public school. I am worried that if this is the way the supposedly best school is run, then the rest of the public schools will be just as bad. I am trying to save our money to send her to a private school, if there is one. As a military family, on a limited budget, you can imagine how difficult this will be on us.
I hope that you can understand how I am feeling right now, and have been all year long. I hope that something is done to improve that school. Please do something. If they did it to me, they will do it to someone else.
Thank you for your time,
Abby Hill
PS. A pet peeve of mine would be that the school has never called me MRS. Hill. They have always called me by my first name. I never gave them leave do this. I have tried to correct them on this as well, to no avail. You have no idea how disrespectful it is to have a woman half your age, calling you by your first name AND teaching your child to call you by your first name. My daughter didn't stop calling me by my first name for well over two months after I dis-enrolled her.
Update: After writing and sending this letter to the school district, I was screamed at in the hallway by her "teacher" Mrs Shit (Mrs. Schmidt). I was attending the school musical program that my daughter was attending (we didn't know about the musical program until the night before, and we had to spend all night practicing her songs), and Mrs Shit decided now would be the best time to pull me off to the side of the hallway and scream at me. Apparently, I am a liar...even though I have witnesses to all of the above events. I found this even more unprofessional, and she is lucky I didn't punch her in the face. The gall of that bitch! Not only were other parents and other students around, but she is literally spitting in my face about NOTHING! She's just SCREAMING! You want to know what she was screaming? Pretty much that she was pregnant....Yup. She is screaming at me about her pregnancy? She's not even screaming at me about anything I had done, or my child had done...or even the letter. She is in my face SCREACHING that she is pregnant.
Also, the Halloween photos were displayed on a projector at the school musical program. Apparently, Mrs. Shit lied and they aren't blurry. She's just a lazy person.
I have since transferred my daughter to a NEW school. The new school is already treating her better then her last school did. I was also warned that if Kenzie cannot adapt to this school and is "kicked out" (I'm not sure why she'd be kicked out, she's a great kid...and didn't do anything wrong)...then she will be REQUIRED to be home schooled. She is not allowed to miss even a day of school. I understand that completely, however I am still feeling like the school district is blaming my family/daughter/me because of all our issues with the old school. It doesn't ever occur to anyone else that maybe, just maybe, the school has some issues. Instead, they are trying to brush it under a rug again.
But...who cares? My daughter is going to a better school now, and I will NEVER need to deal with this school EVER again!
Update:
Since having taken my child out of this school, we have noticed a few underlying issues. My daughter's teacher was teaching my child to call me by my first name. Yup. I have been slowly trying to get my daughter to call me "mommy" again, instead of my first name. You have no idea how disrespectful and ignorant this is of a teacher to do. I cannot even begin to explain how PISSED I am that my child calls me by my first name now, instead of mommy. Why did the shit teacher do this? Why? Oh right. Because she's a worthless bitch who doesn't know what the hell she is doing.
Also, my daughter is still having issues with "being left alone". Yes, this is part of her condition. However, them losing her and all of the other issues we have had...have caused her to spiral out of control in this regard.
I also have lost memories. The pictures of their Halloween party were displayed at the end of school year program. So, not only did the teacher LIE about the pictures being "too blurry", but she refused to allow anyone else to take photos of the class/my daughter. Thanks for that, shit teacher. It's always nice to see photos that I specifically asked for multiple times, on display. Especially after you have LIED to me all year about them!!!!!
ALSO! Stop fucking calling me! I get 3 phone calls a WEEK from you. My child doesn't attend your shitty school anymore! STOP CALLING ME! If you thought you were being cute sending me re-enrollment paperwork, then you are fucking retarded! Stop sending me mail! THIS IS HARASSMENT!
Update: 09/26/12
I received phone calls from this school, even after she was no longer attending there, 3 times a week for over 4 months. My daughter was dis-enrolled in that school April 20th, 2012. Yet, I still received spam phone calls and REAL phone calls from the school administrators for MONTHS. I even received more letters in the mail from the school about registering her for the upcoming year. What?!
In fact, when she started her new school, her speech teacher was informed NOT to transfer my daughter's files to the new school by request of the principal. The new school and the school district had to strongly tell them to forward the paperwork. It took about two months for the paperwork to be forwarded.
To note: I made sure to TELL the school district in APRIL that I did NOT want ANY contact with her previous school. They did not adhere to the school district in that regard, and I have the phone bill to prove it.
My daughter is currently attending Bridger Elementary, and I can say she has NEVER been happier. Her separation anxiety has all but disappeared, and there have been ZERO issues with her. Her teacher recently informed me that she is in the top percentile in math, reading, and writing. Her old school never noticed that, but the new one made sure to inform me that she is VERY smart.
Update: 8/13/2013
My daughter has successfully managed to get through an ENTIRE school year without any problems. The only problem any of us had with this new school was that field trip where the teacher was absent. When my daughter was being teased for her speech patterns, the teacher stopped it almost immediately. The principal even made sure that I was okay with how things were progressing with her. I am still very tempted to bake him cookies just for being understanding.
My daughter was never lost once at the new school. She was only bullied once, and it was stopped almost immediately. She received such high grades, AND her teacher knew what she was doing!! Even though her teacher missed a lot of the school year, you could tell her teacher was AMAZING at her job!!
We loved this school so much that we enrolled my eldest AND youngest to attend this school, starting next week. (My youngest is starting kindergarten this year) I am overall really, really happy with the way this school operates.
My eldest was even given the "Leadership Award". She certainly is a little trooper. I cannot even begin to imagine what life would have been like if we had stayed at the previous school.
Also, someone made an offhand comment about my blog. One of the secretaries from one of the other schools has read it. She even teased and said if I "didn't like something, I'll probably just blog about it". Yup. I'll blog about it. It's best to have it all documented, then to ignore what was happening.
Also, turns out Mrs. Shit was also telling my daughter about "sex". I spent the entire last year trying to avoid the conversation, and then wound up giving really brief explanations. Great teaching and parenting there, bitch!
My daughter does NOT have RAAD anymore. Thank god. She has her moments still, but nowhere near as bad as before. It was originally really hard in the beginning of the year, what with the way the old school LOST her (if you don't know where someone/something is, it's lost). She went through all of the sudden changes like a trooper, and to this day: when we pass her old school, she calls it hell. Yup. She calls it hell and tells me how much she hated it there.
Update 10/26/13:
The teacher has since been fired, I have heard rumors that she "sometimes" substitutes. We have had zero issues with my daughter's new school. She has been attending there for TWO years now, and not one issue. If there seemed to be an issue, the school handled it appropriately IMMEDIATELY. They didn't play the "blame the victim" game. This new school has been fantastic. (My daughter also does not need speech therapy anymore, as it was a minor issue in the beginning...it has completely cleared up now)
I have been more active in the PTA, etc, and I have heard other parents' horror stories about Woodruff. Apparently a LOT of kids are transferred out of Woodruff, and not just us. I have met about 15 other parents who had similiar bullying issues, not only from students but from the STAFF.
Woodruff STAFF DO look at reviews like this. I have had a few side comments when I am forced to be in their presence (signing up for school choice this year, the Woodruff nurse had the nerve to mention my yelp review...I wasn't even talking to her and how did she know who I was???). This school is horrible!!!
Woodruff tried to cover their butts about everything that happened, but after a lengthy discussion with the school district...they realized how WRONG they were. It took going to the school district and doing school choice, to get that school to even admit that they lost my child. (There are plenty of other issues that happened at this school, but my update would be WAY too long to even post...)
The secretary has also been fired. (This could be because of her numerous attempts to cover up what happened, or her many lectures to me. I'm 30 yrs old, I don't need to be lectured on the phone for 30 minutes about how bullying supposedly does NOT exist in Kindergarten. Idiot, bullying happens everywhere and at any age.)
From what I can tell, they have TRIED to change some things...but the principal is still there (I had to have my daughter's therapist write a note so she'd never be left alone with him ever again - he even stalked me while picking up my child - AND he kept her in a room by himself multiple times...not just once).
My daughter developed RAD (reactive attachment disorder) because of this school (the catalyst was them losing her at school, yay!). She started hitting herself, having crying fits, couldn't be left alone for longer then 30 seconds, etc. It took TWO YEARS with therapy AND a new school, to get her to act somewhat normal again. I couldn't even put gas in the car without her freaking out that I had "left" her. You have NO IDEA the PAIN this school caused my child!! They are SO lucky I didn't sue them!
PS. The teacher admitted that she wanted to go home early, so she put my daughter on the school bus instead of waiting with her. I picked up my daughter EVERYday at the same time (on time), and this lazy teacher decided her FUN TIME was more important then my daughter's safety!!!!!!!
