Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Mother's Day Presents and Teacher Drama...

I tend to go out of my way to make gifts for my kids' classes.  I put a budget on all of our gifts, so that it is NEVER more then $50.00 ($.83 per kid~ with extras) for major holidays.  Mother's Day is one of those ones that I denied the budget for, and went up to $75.00 ($1.25 per kid~ with extras).  We are basically notorious in the school for doing amazing things.  (Christmas was a huge hit.  We did rice krispie snowmen, reindeer candy canes, and cute little snowflake cupcakes...plus some goodie bags)

Everyone always assumes I spend a TON of money doing all of this...really?  It's mainly just like two days of work gluing or making shit.

I will tell you right now, no one other parent has EVER made anything for any of my kids' classes in over three years...until this past Valentine's Day.  Someone hand stitched the Valentine's.  I was not going to do that.  It'd be way too much work for 60-80 kids.  The parent that did this only has one kid...I have three - two in school.  No fucking way, I'm doing THAT.  But, that is the ONLY time ANYONE has EVER done a gift.

Sadly, she didn't even do one for Christmas.  What.the.fuck?!  So Valetine's Day is more important than Christmas, I guess.  Whatever you one-upping trying bitch.  She doesn't come close to winning the "class gift war".  I am still reigning supreme.  Hell...even teacher's not in charge of my kids are begging for gifts for THEIR classes (they always offer to reimburse me, but really?  I don't have the time to do that many).

I initially was going to just do those cheap flower pens.  You know the ones.  You've probably seen them a million times.  Flowers glued to the top of a pen, wrapped in green gardener's tape.  Easy, done.  Would cost me about $.30 per kid!  Yes, new record!

However....that all changed....

I went into my youngest daughter's class to ask her teacher if she wanted the children to put the tape on the pens, and to give to their mothers.  The teacher said, (direct quote) "We usually do the ink stamps of their hands, but that can get messy...so I was at a loss of what to do. I'm so happy you are offering to do this for them!  I really had no idea what we were going to do!"  I agreed to let them help, and offered to drop off the mostly finished pens on May 5th (it was April 24th when I was asking about this, as I was going to the store THAT DAY to get my shit and get it done with).  Fine, whatever, I'll do most of the work and just drop it off.

Let me just say this about the Kindergarten teachers I have come across in my many years being a parent in the public school system.  They all suck.  Most of them have no kids of their own, and don't have a fucking clue what they are doing.  That is my experience here.  Even my husband says there is something "off" about this teacher.  His latest encounter with her didn't bode well for his opinion either...she said hi, he said hi...then she turned her back to him and ignored him.  Uh...okay...  Sadly, that was the first time they had ever met too.

This is the same damn teacher that watched my daughter trip, fall (no injury), and let her cry in the playground (while I am watching from my parking spot, waiting for school to get out) for OVER ten minutes BEFORE I finally had to get out of my car and tell my daughter to just go play.  Like really, woman?  Is she bleeding?  No?  Okay, go play.  Stop fucking coddling the kid.  Ridiculous.  Hell, my youngest trips and falls on her HEAD every five minutes when walking.  That kid is NOT new to owies caused by her own feet.  (She tends to run faster then her feet can manage...hell once at school, she tripped and hit her head on the sidewalk...then she SKIDDED with her HEAD to a halt! LOL She has a little scar, but damn if the SAME TEACHER didn't put a bandaid on her head and NOT clean out the wound.  I took off the bandaid and there was GRAVEL in her head...GRAVEL!)

Seriously, I think it should be a damn rule that if you are going to be a fucking teacher...then either you need to have kids of your own (and I don't mean a fucking infant that can't talk) OR you have to be REALLY fucking amazing with kids.  Otherwise, you really should NEVER be a teacher to anyone under the age of 12.  Most teachers I have come across can't find their head from their own ass.  So far, I can count of TWO teachers in these three years that actually know their shit.

I went to my oldest daughter's class, and her teacher just loves me.  I asked her the same question...kids put together or me do it?  You know that one little girl in the class that always has to one up your kid?  Well, my oldest has one too!  (My youngest has turned into a fucking bully, but whatever)  So, while I am asking the teacher said question....this little shit stain comes up to the teacher's desk (obviously she was eavesdropping....not rude or anything, right?) and says: "OH! I've seen THAT before!"

The teacher actually says: "Well, since you like to go overboard anyways..." Wow...just wow...  I spend barely any money on my class gifts... All it takes is maybe a day or two of work, and I'm done.  How is making sure shit doesn't look like shit, going overboard?  What the fuck ever.  I obviously don't comment on this, as I'm not some rude cunt.

So, the teacher and I start brainstorming ideas that might make it different somehow.  I am obviously blackmailed into this, as the kid would NOT let it go.  She couldn't just be HAPPY that she was getting something to give to her mother - FOR FREE!   Nooooooo!!!!!!

We finally come up with the idea of doing pots and like 3 flower pens per kid.  Shit.  My budget is wrecked now.  I tried everything I could to get out of doing something so elaborate and time consuming.  Don't these people know I have a 4 month old at home now?  God damn it.

I get all of the materials the same day, and finish painting/gluing pens by 2am.  It actually turned out that the gardener's tape wouldn't stay on the pens (no matter what I tried) without hot gluing it.  Sigh.  So much for the kids doing their own projects!  OH...but wait!  I have an idea!  I'll just tell the teacher's to have kids make cards to attach to the pots/pens, and then it is strictly from THEM.  Woot!

So, I write a note to both teachers letting them know the days I can come into the classrooms to help the kids.

I did NOT expect the response I got back.  My oldest teacher was fucking in awe and wanted me to come in really badly.  My youngest teacher sent a note home that was pretty much insulting as fuck.

The note said that she wanted the kids to make their own Mother's Day gifts, and since I had done 99% of the work...that she was no longer interested in involving the children in it.  She wrote that I could still bring them in if I wanted to (and keep 40 pots lying around my house?  no thanks....I don't really have a choice now, bitch) but that I don't need to come to the class OR bring in the pots anymore.  She would come up with something herself.

Wow.  This is fucking free.  You should be on your fucking knees thanking the shit out of me for doing all this work - and in one night no less.  But instead, you go from telling me it's an awesome idea and all on board...to...being a straight up bitch.  Awesome job.

I still haven't decided what I am going to do.  I might still send them in.  However, I DO feel like this teacher is wholly unappreciative of all the work AND money I spent doing this...AND it was with her seal of fucking approval.

Update:

The day I brought all of the pots in, the Kindergarten teacher was super impressed.  She wanted all of them.  They were handed out that day.  She thanked me in a note and in person.  I'm not sure why she caused such a big deal out of this whole thing, but I wasn't going to have 40 something pots sitting around my house just because she changed her damn mind the night before.

The secretary even got a pot.  The secretary put her pot on her desk and dressed it up with some stuff.  I have a picture of it somewhere.

So, all that drama over her not wanting the pots was pointless on her end.  I wound up having only 3 left after making over 80.  The parents were also impressed and I was later stopped by some expressing their thanks.

Some of the mothers even stopped to ask me HOW I manage to get all of my classroom gifts done.  Huh?  I just do it over time.  I bang it out a month in advance sometimes and just finish it the night before.  It's not really difficult.

Friday, April 11, 2014

Delivery, Severe Postpartum Pre-Eclampsia, and Spinal Meningitis (And...My Mother)

This will be VERY long and has been a LONG time coming.  I have been dealing with other bullshit lately.  I will go into detail about the "delightful" nurses and my SPD later.  Forgive me if I forget some things to my story, as I was not "all there" during this...


The Delivery and Being Released

I recently gave birth on 1/13/14, to a wonderful baby boy (our third child), after a VERY difficult pregnancy.  I had developed SPD (Symphysis Pubis Disorder) so bad that I couldn't walk after the 6th month of pregnancy.  My hips were actually dislocated by more then 4 inches, and no amount of physical therapy fixed it.  We prayed that giving birth would.  Until I gave birth, I was on hydrocodone four times a day, at a high dose.  I had to have help getting out of bed, sitting up in bed, rolling onto my side...you name it.  I was pretty much paralyzed from the waist down (unless I wanted intense pain), though my husband wishes my mouth was paralyzed. ;P  I used a wheelchair during my time out of the house.

I had been having contractions for well over 2 months steadily (not that anyone cared about that!).  It was absolutely terrible, and I KNEW that something was wrong with all those contractions!  No one believed me, not even after begging for an induction (6 days before my due date) and multiple visits to the ER.  My MIL actually flew out from halfway across the country to take care of all of us while I couldn't walk and was having issues.  She's a saint, and lasted up until one day postpartum.  That's a LONG time to help out!!  She even held my hand during the really bad contractions sometimes.

Even though you are in labor after 35 weeks, unless your water has broken and are considered in "active" labor (dilated more than a 3) - they won't do anything but monitor you.  Wonderful.  My water kept breaking, but coming back a week or so later, and I never dilated more than a 1.5 on my own.  If you ever have any problems during your pregnancy and call the Labor and Delivery ward for help/assistance...they just tell you to come in.  Pretty much, it's a waste of time calling them.  I don't even know why we bothered.  I could have just googled better then they answered.  Half the time, I convinced my husband NOT to take me in - no matter how much pain I was in.

More then 10 times being hospitalized for heat exhaustion (x3), pneumonia/bronchitis (x1), SPD (x2, but misdiagnosed with round ligament pain both times!), early labor (x3), and then once for my contractions (and learning they can't do anything about it!).  For my early contractions hospitalization, I was one day shy of week 39.  ONE DAY.  So, I was caught in two red tape hells.  One:  the hospital was preparing for Obamacare, so I couldn't be induced before week 39 (ANOTHER reason for me to hate Obama!  Thanks, asshole!).  Two: I had a scheduled induction planned for the next day, so the hospital denied starting labor 10 hours (yes TEN HOURS) early because I had been scheduled already.  I am dead serious, it was ALL about the paperwork.  I was sent home, ten hours before my induction date while in labor (still not active labor).  Got to be kidding me!!  However, they gave me a sleeping pill so that I could "sleep through" the contractions.  Surprisingly, after three hours of waiting for it to kick in, it actually did.  I got 4 hours of sleep before my induction.

My delivery took forever.  I was on a VERY slow drip from 6am until 5:19pm..  They would not let it go faster then a snail's pace because the doctor "wasn't ready yet".  This was because the on call doctor wanted all three of us currently in the Labor and Delivery ward to be delivered around the same time...to save herself time.  I'm really not kidding, as THREE nurses told me this.  I'm still surprised they admitted this to me.  I sat in active labor, with a VERY slow drip of oxytocin for over 9 hours...before they finally upped it to the proper levels for induction, and within minutes he was born.

My actual epidural was HORRIBLE.  The doctor giving the epidural took forever to get there.  Which is actually horrible for someone who has been in LABOR for MONTHS.  He tried to put the needle in a few times (I can't remember how many), and then eventually gave up on that spot.  He got it into the exact middle of my back on the first try.  Why didn't he just do that the first time?  Did he even know what he was doing?

My favorite part during my delivery was that every time the machine took my blood pressure automatically, it asked on the computer screen whether or not I was breastfeeding.  I am not kidding.  Every time we changed it to bottle feeding only, the computer tried to change it to breastfeeding every time it took my blood pressure.  According to the nurses it was just a glitch.  I don't know if I really believe that though, as this a very serious PRO-breastfeeding hospital.  The only reason I even delivered there was because the other hospital is over 2 hours away.  I think this hospital doesn't get a lot of formula feeders, and so the computer kept trying to change it back to breastfeeding.  Yes, it was probably a glitch.  However, being asked EVERY time your blood pressure cuff goes off (it was every fifteen min), if you are breastfeeding or not...can be VERY irritating and it's a little weird that it asked only when the blood pressure was being checked.  It never asked before or after delivery.  It didn't ask every contraction.  Just every time my blood pressure was checked.  I feel like this was a man-made "glitch".  Someone set it up to ask that question if "formula feeding only" was checked.

I knew it was time (as most every mother knows) when I needed to push.  However, the two nurses in the room were trying to convince me that it wasn't time and that I didn't need the doctor yet!  Boy were they mistaken, and I made sure to tell them that!  I tried very hard not to push...then I REALLY had to because my hip pain was becoming SO intense that even the epidural wasn't stopping it.

Three pushes, and his little feetsies were almost out by the time the doctor FINALLY came to see me.  The look on her face was priceless.  I'm not sure why everyone was so surprised, as I TOLD them it was time.  I had also been having contractions for well over 2 months, and he was MORE then ready to come out.  Even before the epidural, I only felt my hip pain and not the contraction pain.  I didn't even tear, which was also a first for me.  Funny thing, even with the epidural, my hip pain was SO severe I was still in massive pain during those three pushes.  Phew!  Thank god he came out fast!

Mind you, before I gave birth, I stressed how important it was not to hand him to me first.  That was my husband's right this time.  I had gotten to hold the girls first each time, and I personally felt that it was his turn (I didn't tell them why, just told them he gets to hold the baby first).  I also stressed that they not hand him to ANYONE while he was bloody still.  That he needed to be washed off.  I am terrible with blood.  I actually start to have a mini-panic attack over even small scrapes my kids get.  Yes, the nurses and the delivery doctor made a big show of trying to hand him to me all bloody and gross. Did they not even look at the white board that said NOT to do that?  I'm pretty sure I kept repeating "No no no no".  After they cleaned him off, they tried to hand him to me again and I had to correct them again.  "No, my husband gets to hold him first."  After one of the younger nurses tried to argue with me, she was pretty much told it was none of her business and then she tried to put him back in the baby warmer without ANYONE holding him.  My husband finally just took our son out of her arms and held him (before she got the warmer).  There were lots of tears on his part, and we are both really happy he got to hold him before anyone else technically could.

After the delivery, my husband got the flu while we were in the hospital (didn't find this out until the next day).  We were only there 12 hrs post delivery, total time:  21 hours~.  I pushed to be released early, as we were already having issues with the nurses.  I don't really care who you are, I've had two kids already and I've raised them mostly correctly.  I don't need to be constantly lectured or argued with about EVERYTHING.  I also don't want to be in the hospital with nurses waking us up every 30 minutes (it was super irritating) for absolutely NOTHING.  It was really a "hey are you two still alive?" kind of thing.  Not even to check my BP or anything.  Just to annoy the shit out of me.

Before you ask, no my kidlets and MIL could NOT come to the hospital because they were still on a flu ban.  Meaning, my husband was barely allowed to be in there for the delivery and that ONLY after I pitched a fit.  I really just wanted to be home as a family, with all my kids together.  (I'm never away from my kidlets long and before this story, never spent a night away from them.)

My hip actually knocked back into place about an hour after delivery.  The nurses were so shocked by the noise that they thought I had broken my hip completely.  It was really funny, actually.  After being in a wheelchair and catatonic for so long, I was up and bouncing around within minutes.  MINUTES!  It was fantastic!  (Even post delivery by 4 months, I never had another problem walking again.  It only has issues now when the meningitis recurs.)

I also really, REALLY disliked being watched while I peed.  They made me do this FIVE times in front of TWO nurses, every time.  Overkill much?  I drank as much water as I possibly could, just to get it over with.  The nurses actually STARED at me while I peed.  Not even just a standing in there and measuring after I was done.  WATCHING me dead in the eye, while I am peeing.

They made me watch over 122 minutes of breastfeeding videos, even though I wasn't breastfeeding and they TOLD me I could skip it...yet magically, the clicker to fast forward never showed up for those 122 minutes.  Magically...  However, there was only a 2 minute video on formula feeding.  And people say that more breastfeeding information needs to be out there!  HA!  We need more on formula feeding, as that video was horribly done!  I was badgered by numerous nurses into breastfeeding, and why I wasn't.  When they finally gave me up as a lost cause to their breastfeeding agenda, they informed me how to supposedly dry up my milk.  They don't offer either pill to dry it up, even though I asked.  Neither the one that causes strokes, nor the newer one (it's offered everywhere else around the world, but not the USA).

Also my milk didn't dry up for almost 9 days, while I was horribly engorged and in massive pain.  Cabbage, ice/heating packs, showers/baths, wrapping them in ace bandages, too tight sports bra all did nothing.  My boobs were the size of footballs (easily a size H) and burning up by the time I got to the Medical Ward.  It wound up drying up while in the Medical Ward, by using nursing pads.  It only took three days of using the hospital grade nursing pads to dry up, or maybe it was the massive antibiotics (?).  It also made my preeclampsia and meningitis issues even WORSE (I will get into this later).  Not sure why they didn't just give me the nursing pads after delivery, instead of when I was in there for meningitis...but whatever.  This was yet another example of the nurses trying to punish me for not going along with whatever they thought was best.  This nurses tried to push a LOT of their own agendas on me, and when I wouldn't budge...they'd either come up with new hoops to jump through to get out of the hospital, or try to purposefully make my life miserable  (Wanted an epidural, and it took 3 hours to get one... Wanted to bottle feed and constantly badgered... Wanted a smoke and was harassed about how evil I am for smoking (also told if I went to smoke, my kidlet would have to stay in the hospital without me)! Wanted out early, and had to jump through like 15 hoops just to get out... etc etc)

I also had to watch another 56 minutes on how to be a good parent and not kill your child...even though I have two that managed to survive having me as their mother!  (/gasp)  They call the no-reason-to-cry crying, purple crying.  That's new, and I'm unsure why it needs a cute name.  I think I fell back asleep during this part, because really...as a two time mom, this is no big surprise to me.  Sometimes kids just wanna have a fit, no matter the age.  I personally liked the beginning where they were showing fake "abuse" scenarios with people smothering their kids and shaking them to get them to stop crying.  Most of the "learning" shit they made me watch was SO over the top, and most of the things said were complete common sense.  Shit, at the end of the videos, it even says "use common sense".  Well, then why did I just watch all that shit??  Oh right, because common sense isn't so common.  (There was also some small clips on diet and exercise after delivery...which I was totally not gonna give a shit about anyways.)

One of the made up conditions before being allowed to leave the hospital was that my monkey had to eat every 1-2 hours, and it had to be a decent amount of feeding before we were permitted to go home.  It couldn't be late, and they wanted a full 1 ounce bottle every time.  Because we might starve him to death at home, of course!  They also wanted to inspect the bottles to make sure he was really eating that much. There is NO reason to force moms to overfeed their baby that much.  We are a feed on demand family (not something the nurses agreed with either!).  If the baby is hungry, then they get fed.  Yes, we do check in between to make sure they aren't hungry.  After two kids, you'd think I'd have down how to feed a fucking newborn.  It's really not that damn hard to figure out!  At his very first appointment, we were told he gained two pounds and he had grown two inches...looks like we know what the fuck we are doing!

Expecting a newborn to eat an ounce every 1-2 hours immediately after birth is just insanity.  After the first puke, they are LUCKY that I went along with their bullshit.  So, instead of over-feeding my little bundle and not allowing me to feed on command, I made the fuck up of those numbers and no one was the wiser.  I even called them in when he ate even just 1/25th of an ounce, for real or not.  If they wanted to be assholes, I could be too.  It also doesn't help that my monkey is a comfort sucker either.  He just likes to have ANYTHING in his house and suck on it.  He learned real quick that his thumb was available. LOL

We even had to provide our own formula.  I know for a FACT that majority, if not all, of hospitals provide formula while in the hospital.  But, according to our nurses, there was no formula left AT ALL.  Not even for the NICU, amazing how did those kids get fed then?  We didn't even specify a type (though I lean towards soy, iron filled usually because my kids have colic), yet they were out of it.  They just wanted to see what we were going to do.  They really tried VERY hard to push the breastfeeding thing on us.  Luckily, I brought a can of formula and some bottles with us.  I figured if things got out of hand that I might need them.

I was watched like a hawk, and I tried to get as much sleep as possible.  My husband passed out on the couch immediately after delivery for a very long time.  The nurses had issues with everything I was doing...such as putting my knees up and letting the monkey lay on them.  They had issues with me co-sleeping, even if the bed was down all the way and the railings up.  I only co-slept with monkey because I was in and out of sleep.  It was much easier to have him in arm's reach then in this tall glass thing that I couldn't reach at all without getting completely untangled from IVs (etc).  They didn't like his pacifier.  They even had issues when my husband was playing with the baby by making faces.  I kid you not, one of the nurses thought it was inappropriate that a father plays with his kids (her exact words were: that's not a father's role!).  Pretty much, most of the nurses were self-righteous assholes.

My baby slept in the room with me.  He was considered to be a "well baby".  He is actually the best baby I've ever had.  My girls were louder and never slept...at all.  Even to this day, he sleeps like the dead and mostly through the night.

After my baby was circumsized, they told us we could not be released until he had peed. This was because he didn't bleed when it was first done (he's a slow bleeder).  When it did finally start to bleed, OH MY GOD!  It probably wasn't as bad as I imagined it, but holy shit...there was a lot.  Waiting for him to pee wound up taking 3 hours (damn boy, just go!).  This was not originally on my checklist of being released, and it was a "last minute" hoop they threw at me.  I was not surprised, as they had tried to throw several others at me (such as letting them watch ME pee five times instead of the original two...).

Before we left, yet another hoop was thrown at us and a few insults!  I'm fairly certain they were looking for ANYTHING to keep us, hence they were looking into the insurance information AGAIN.  Mind you, my insurance had already been previously billed BEFORE my delivery (though there were some extra charges that had to EVENTUALLY be refunded later by the hospital).  This time it wasn't the nurses causing trouble, though I am sure they were somehow involved.  The nurses' manager (I forget the title) was looking at my insurance information/birth certificate and saw that technically it says I married to my ex-husband and not my husband.  This is mainly because of the type of insurance we have, and if you try to change it - it's really a pain in the ass to charge them.  So, we left it the way it was for convenience.   Anyways, this was during the time the lactation consultant is trying to convince me to half bottle feed and half breastfeed.  I'm happy the idiot was interrupted, but not with this.

Nurses' Manager (NM):  I was looking at your baby's birth certificate that you filled out and it says here that Christopher ___ is the father.  Is this correct?

Me:  Yes, that's correct.

NM:  Well, it says on your insurance information that Jeffery __ is your husband, but on the birth certificate it says that Chris ___ is the father.  So, I was wondering if you needed a paternity test.

Chris (quietly to me):  I am sitting right here....

Me:  I know who the father of my child is.  Chris the father.  If I needed a paternity test, I'd get one done.  Jeffery ___ and I are divorced.  I am remarried.  The insurance information doesn't look up to date because of the insurance company's policy is a little whacky.  I am 100% covered by them, and they have already been pre-billed for our hospital stay here.  I am unsure as to why either of this would be an issue.  Yes, I am covered on my ex-Husband's insurance due to our divorce agreement, and yes, Chris ___ is the father and my new husband.  I do not understand why I am having to explain my life to you, in order to be released from the hospital.

NM:  I was just making sure that you weren't trying to rope anyone into child support.  (looks at Chris)  We just didn't know who the father was, and wanted to make sure that you did.

Me:  Well, it's really none of your business.  (she leaves without a word)

**There was some more said in the middle, but it was pretty much implying that I'm a whore.**

It was very rude and really should not have been brought up in front of Chris at all.  He was sitting right there, and could hear the entire conversation.  If I did truly need a paternity test, you might want to ask him to leave the room before you mention something so "sensitive" (in her mind) in front of him.  How was this even her business?  If I wanted a paternity test, I would get one.  I'm fairly certain I know who the fuck I  had sex with...and if I didn't that is MY business NOT hers nor the hospital's!  Also, since when do the hospital's nursing manager ask the brand new mother if they want a paternity test??  Is this a new policy?  Like what the fuck.  He even signed the damn paperwork himself.  If I knew this was going to be an issue, I would have sent it in my damn self without the hospital doing it!!!  I also think she was talking about the child support garbage, because Chris was looking VERY upset.  She was probably trying to placate him, but in the end pissed me off even more.  I don't think that is any of her business either!  I also didn't appreciate being basically called a whore in front of not only the lactation consultant, but two OTHER nurses (and the door was wide open!) AND Chris.

With a promise to do a bilirubin test the next day, we were FINALLY released by a not very nice nurse.  She even escorted us all the way to our car, and watched us like a crazy person.  She wouldn't let me out of my wheelchair until he had already pulled the car around.  I thought that was hysterical, because I didn't need it at all.  While my husband went to get the car, she was dead silent just staring at the baby and I.  It was like she was looking for a reason to make us stay.  She eventually tried to come up with one, but it wasn't a very good one.  She didn't think we had extra blankets on us.  I'm fairly certain if we didn't, she would have made us stay until we had one brought from home.

Did you know that when a nurse tells you to wrap your child in the hospital blanket, and you do it...that you're not actually supposed to do it?  Yup, she told us to wrap him in the hospital blanket because it was very cold outside (it actually wasn't, and this was another hoop).  So we did, and when we went to put his car seat in the car, she told me to return the blanket.  LOL  She made me take the blanket off of him, after telling me to put it on him, after he was in the car.  Wow.  Because we all know that $2 cheap hospital blanket is totally worth being a bitch over!  She wasn't going to let us leave until she was 100% positive we had another blanket to put on him.  She probably would have forced my husband to go home, get one, and bring it back...before letting us leave again.

I was finally released from the hospital.  They told me that because they were releasing me early (supposedly....), that my baby would need to come in the very next day for a bilirubin test.  This tests for jaundice.  I know what jaundice is, and my kid did NOT have it.  It also helps that I am formula feeding, if I was breast feeding it could make it worse.  We did go in the next day.  I was pissed to be there.  It took 45 minutes to be seen WITH an appointment.  His blood was so thick that it would take another HOUR to get enough to test.  His bili was 1 slot above normal.  Meaning, he's a newborn and with each passing hour...it is going down.  Nothing to worry about.  At.  All.

Even though, after being "dismissed" from the hospital early (another way to punish me), he had to have SEVEN bilirubin tests.  He was never considered to be in danger.  I went along with the first few tests to be agreeable, but I quickly lost my patience after the second normal test.  My husband wound up taking him for the others, as I was in the hospital and even if I wasn't - I was done with people being assholes to me.  The bilirubin tests only stopped when I refused my son this treatment (at the hospital).  I actually had to go there.  I've never said that before to anyone, but I finally snapped after the 7th test and told them they weren't going to torture my child anymore.

Did you know that during the first three to seven days after birth, that the bilirubin test will spike?  Yes.  His spiked because they were taking tests DURING the spike...so we had to keep taking more.  This research and my own knowledge, saved him a LOT more pain.  To finally stop the torturing I had to refuse treatment on his behalf.  After explaining to my pediatrician that I was done with the test, she agreed.  The pediatrician then made sure that he NEVER needed to do it again.

We wound up just taking him to our pediatrician.  She did the test, it took forever.  They had to fill up 10 complete circles on a piece of paper to have it tested.  He cried and cried.  After all of these tests, at four months old now...he HATES it when people touch his feet.  I don't blame the sucker.  Sometimes, he lets us tickle him...but he immediately jerks his feet away first.

In fact, one of the head nurses even tried to crack a joke with me about being released early.  The nurse had the gall to say that I should stay longer, because my insurance covered "as long as needed"!  No, thanks, I want to go home!  Bitch.  I want out.  Now.  I miss my kids.


Meningitis and Severe Postpartum Pre-Eclampsia

Two days after giving birth, I felt like I had the flu and bronchitis, too.  I figured it was because when getting induced I had the flu/bronchitis, epidural headache, induction headache, hormonal headache...or something else.  Normal things that I had dealt with before.  (I figured most likely epidural headache, as they had done it higher then normal and it took them a while to get the needle in.)

Sadly, my mother in law had left earlier in the day.  So, we were on our own.  It actually sucked for my husband.  Poor guy.  I feel really bad for him.  I doubt he got much sleep at all, if any.

I slept another day to recover, and woke up to light sensitivity and my vision randomly fading to black.  Imagine one of those older types of TVs, when you turned it off - it would slowly fade out to off.  That's how my vision was.  I knew something wasn't right, as this blackout thing had never happened to me before.  (During my pregnancy, I had the "floaters" but was told it was "normal")

I still chalked it up to "something is wrong", but after a call to the OBGYN - I was assured that this could happen post delivery after an epidural and induction.  I was told to take it easy, and make sure to take the little man in for his bilirubin test.

By end of day 3, I had developed a very serious migraine, light sensitivity, nausea, neck pain that goes all the way down my back (to my butt), and for some reason my left foot hurts to flex it (still all of this occurs when I get ANY type of cold, or not enough sleep).  I went in immediately to the ER, but was released with a "hormonal headache".  I kid you not, they released me without any pain meds or treatment.  The hospital didn't even flinch at my temperature, it was 104.2 at the time.  They didn't even offer to move my room away from the communal bathroom, or allow me to turn off the light in my room.  I flinched everytime the toilet would flush, or someone would talk to themselves in there, because it would echo!  They did do an MRI, but everything came back normal, hence this was a hormonal headache in their eyes.  So, I was released with a hormonal headache and told to take it easy, while still in immense pain.

I actually wound up having a mini-seizure in the bathtub that night.  My little puppy (awesome guard dog) was barking viciously and freaking out.  My husband came into the room to figure out why the fuck the dog was going crazy and saw me seizing.  He said I wasn't coherent, foaming a little, my eyes wigging out (no idea what that means), and I was shaking a lot.  I eventually came too like nothing happened, though I was bit a tired.  He had taken me out of the tub and carried me to the bed.  He was shaking me and asking me if I was okay.  I'm not sure what all happened, as I only have his story to go on.

The very next morning, after yet another horrible night, I did an emergency appointment with the same doctor (not my OB) I had called the day before.  My husband drove me there and I was curled up in a fetal position in my car seat.  I waited as long as I could before finally going in, and after the night I had supposedly had...I was done.  She had to examine me in an all black room, that's how bad it was.  The nurse checked my BP, and it was 210/130!  My bp is usually WAY low, but they didn't tell me what my BP was.  Checked my temperature and it was 103.4!  (All temps over 100 are high in my eyes, and should be taken seriously as they any temperature shows a sign of infection)

After I told her my symptoms and what had "supposedly" (still not sure) happened, my doctor got a look of panic on her face.  I'm not sure who was more scared, her or me.  My husband was actually in the car waiting on me at the time, and so he had no idea what was going on.  She immediately called the ER while I was in the room., she told me she suspected pre-eclampsia but wanted to do a spinal tap to make sure.  I don't really remember what all was said on the phone, but something to the extent of spinal tap immediately and get there now.

Once I informed my husband what was going on...we just kept wondering what the hell was wrong with me so badly, that she told me: "Do not stop for anything!  Go immediately to the ER.  They know you are coming.  Go now.  Do not drive yourself.  Do you have someone to drive you?  I will call an ambulance if you need me to."  Um...okay...

I do know that she made sure they could do the spinal tap as soon as I was admitted, so I wouldn't have to wait.  I immediately pulled my kids out of school and went to the ER.  I do know that she called them.  I do know that I shouldn't of had to wait so long for treatment.

Even though my doctor had previously called in, I still had to wait over two hours to even have my BP checked and no pain medication at all.  (They put me in the same room attached to the public bathroom again, yay!)  So, I basically sat there in massive pain (more so then if I was at home waiting). and covering my eyes with the hoodie of my jacket.  There wasn't even a sheet or pillow on the bed, and it took over 45 minutes just to be admitted.

After checking my BP, temp (temp was gone at this point), and vitals (was just told they were high, not what they were)...they tried to release me again.  I told them to call my pediatrician.  That there was a REASON that I was there.  That they would NOT release me until they had done the correct tests.

So, after much kerfuffle, they tried to give me a spinal tap.  After FIVE attempts to get the needle in (what is wrong with these doctors and needles?!), they sent me down to the spinal tap machine.  The doctor GIVING the spinal tap, was the same one that refused to admit me.  He actually would have killed me if I hadn't of been admitted.  I believe that because I caused such a stink, that he was purposefully being a dick and trying to cause me more pain.  He even made a comment that I can't google my results, and that the internet doesn't always come up with the correct diagnosis...  He said I should leave that sort of thing to the REAL doctors.  Huh?  I did...?

The first FIVE spinal attempts, I felt.  They were VERY painful.  The spinal tap machine?  I didn't feel a thing!  It was the best spinal/epidural I had EVER gotten.  To this day, the spots where they TRIED to get the spinal in - still massively hurt all day long and PULSE with my heartbeat whenever my meningitis acts up.  It was like this for several weeks before finally ONLY happening during recurrences.  I might of actually been too completely fucked up to feel all of the pain, or too far gone.  I was basically half dead when I arrived up there.

About an hour later, I was removed into the ICU.  We were not told why.  After only spending a total of two days with my newborn son, I was admitted into the hospital then and there.  Due to the hospitals ban on children (flu season, go figure)...my children AND husband couldn't see me for the entire length of my stay.  I don't remember much of this time.  I do know that the doctors said that I was having seizures constantly.  Some of them were very serious and most of them were mild.  I don't remember having any of these.

Well, after about 3 days (can't remember much of what happened in the ICU/Medical Ward, or where my husband/kids went), my doctor (same one that sent me to the ER) informed me that not only did I have SEVERE Preeclampsia (which I have never had, nor had EVER been diagnosed with before) AND Spinal Meningitis.  I also had low Vit C, low Iron, and a slew of other things (it's a long list on my discharge paperwork).

We were even able to trace back my infection date back to my delivery date.  One of the main nurses in my delivery room had bronchitis and wasn't wearing a mask the entire time (even during my epidural)...and that's ALL it takes.  She was around me the entire time I was in the hospital, sick.  She infected me with bronchitis and then after the epidural...it just made it all the more easy to get into my spine.  Way. To. Go.  I fully believe that hospitals are a breeding ground for germs now.

As per the severe preeclampsia, it was actually the cause for all of those contractions I had been having.  I was never tested for it during the entire length of my pregnancy.  This is due to the fact that: I had never had it before with my prior pregnancies, I am 29 (not 35+), I am far from obese (only gained 7lbs the entire pregnancy, and weighed 127 at delivery), don't have diabetes or high BP (I am known for having LOW BP), don't have lupus/arthritis/kidney disease, wasn't a fertility issue (conceived naturally), and wasn't giving birth to twins.  Thus I was not considered "at risk" for it.

I do not remember going to the medical ward.  I remember some of my time there.  I was on a drip (I really can't remember for the life of me what it was called...)  to stop the blood pressure from spiking.  Without my blood pressure spiking, the seizures stopped.  I pretty much just hung out most of my time there or slept.  The nurses loved my sense of humor for the most part.  I told all the new nurses that as long as they kept me supplied with ice, cherry coke, made sure the light was off, door shut, and my medication was on time...that I didn't need any help.  It worked out fantastically.

I actually spent most of my 2-3 weeks straight up sleeping and trying to manage my pain.  The pain was VERY intense.  Even when I left, it was still bad.  The doctor assigned to me was a god send.  He was AMAZING!  He did everything in his power to diagnose me CORRECTLY and he made sure that I was doing okay.  He spoke with me every morning, and I'm sure got tired of my lame ass jokes...and ability to NOT retain jack shit (this also caused by the meningitis).

He is the one that physically saved my life.  I started out on about 20 different medications and by the time I left...I was only on 10.  He even told the nurses to let my husband see me.  Remember, there was a ban for the flu?  Well, I only got to see my baby for two days before I almost died.  My husband got to see me for about 15 minutes before they ushered him out again.

Otherwise, I spent a lot of time on Skype just watching the same cartoons as my kids at the same time and talking to them...or I slept.  I slept a LOT.  I slept with about 10 pillows around me, too.  I missed snuggling my kids, and it also helped with the pain.



My Mother


My mom had JUST been in the hospital for a supposed "emergency bronchitis" infection, where one of the nursing home nurses told my entire family that she was dying and had "given up".  When she was even admitted, that same nurse dragged her paralyzed foot across the gravel parking lot and my mom needed to have it cleaned and stitched up before going back.  So she was getting better after being admitted the first time...but went downhill AGAIN because they STILL weren't feeding her.

My mother had been admitted into the hospital around the time that I started feeling sick.  It was the day after I gave birth.  She had a slew of problems, mostly caused by the nursing home NOT feeding her at all.  Instead of feeding her (she was refusing to feed herself), they'd let her starve OR they would give her "protein shakes".

She eventually got out of the ICU, and was placed in the very room next to me on the medical floor.  I am her POA.  The ICU she was in, was saying that POA was useless because according to them she was completely competent.  That is total bullshit, and they knew it.  Even the medical ward agreed I was her POA.  Her doctor called, faxed, and signed all kinds of paperwork ON HIS DAY OFF, to make sure she would get the treatment she needed.  (She was refusing treatment, and I lost my patience and told her to just do the damn tests...hence they called in a social worker etc.  Nice one.)

I will skip ahead real quick to the day before I was released.  There was a male nurse.  He was a dick.  I can't explain him anymore then just that.  He "kind of" laughed at some my jokes, but overall he was fucking a jerk.  He wouldn't check on me.  When it was time for my medication, he'd poke his head in the door and ask what I needed...then disappear.  I only saw his head for the most part.  I later found out that he was a trainee and had no idea what the fuck he was doing.

When I was getting my final blood test done, I had finally become great friends with the blood tester chick.  She was great.  I told her about my mom on day 1.  She promised to keep an eye out for me.  She eventually DID come across her.  So, the final blood test comes and she tells me she found my mom...and she's in the room next door...but don't tell anyone that she told me because she might get into trouble.

As soon as I could, I pressed the call button and the male nurse actually came into the room all the way.  Wow.  That's a first.  I asked him if my mother was next door, and that I was her POA.  I needed to know.  I had not seen my children, husband or her for over three weeks.  I had no idea how she was doing or what was going on.  If she was already in the hospital, I CAN see her!  He told me, he can't break patient confidentiality.  I again told him that I was her POA and to just fucking leave.  Then I started crying.  Up until that point, I had no cried my entire stay.  I was a fucking super cheerful person, always making jokes.  I must have scared him shitless.  He scurried out of the room like the rat he is.  (My friend and I talked a lot on Skype when I was in the hospital and actually made up pokemon entities for all of the nurses, it was pretty entertaining thing to do.  I'll have to find them again eventually)

Yes, I did get to see her.  One of the nurses came back in and told me she was there.  They let me see her within the hour.  It was great to finally see her.  She had a host of problems though.  Yeast infections in every crevice you can imagine, eye infections, skin infections, pneumonia, bronchitis, high BP (the BP medication wasn't working anymore)...you name it, she probably had it.



Being Released

My last session of nurses were complete bitches.  They even forgot to take the damn IV out of my arm when I was released.  We were actually halfway home before I realized it was still in my arm.  When I got back inside the hospital, I was bombarded by my mom's doctors and nurses.  They wanted to a consultation with me there.  So there I was, trying not to die...leaning against a wall...trying to focus on the conversation (I really don't remember much of that either)...and they are lecturing me about my mom's condition.

I was released from the hospital on 1/25/14.  They released me with only enough pain medication to last three days.  Unfortunately, that is all they can prescribe in a hospital.  BP, oxycodone (in the highest dose that is available), nausea, and stool softener medication (and some others...).  I had to call and renew all of my prescriptions the next day.  I still had the headaches, nausea, random high BP (I had to buy my own monitor from Walmart), light sensitivity, hadn't gone #2 since 1/16 (AFTER my son was born), can't eat very well (I'm hungry but for some reason can't eat solids?), and god forbid I even clean a little bit...I might pass out.

My husband had me isolated in our bedroom.  He won't let me near the baby (I could kill him).  The kids and my husband couldn' even come near me without a mask and gloves.  (Also available at Walmart)  And even after all of this:  I was still contagious until 2/3/14, and nothing has changed since I was first diagnosed.  Wow.  That is officially 28 days of NOT seeing my newborn (or kids), and 2 days of actually being with him (or kids).



Conclusion

All in all, after my experience, I do NOT trust hospitals OR doctors (besides the one doctor that sent me to the ER and treated me while in the hospital).  They made my son take SEVEN unneeded bilirubin tests (due to my being early released), they didn't diagnose me the FIRST time I admitted myself, I got infected IN the hospital while delivering!, I was never diagnosed with preeclampsia, and I was STILL so infectious that I couldn't be around my newborn.  Let's not even get into the fact that for the 14+ days I was in the hospital, I wasn't even allowed to see my husband, let alone my children!

This has been devastating for my family.  My husband almost lost his job because of all of the time he had taken off of work (they don't offer paternity leave, only maternity leave - talk about sexist!).  My newborn had no idea who I am, and my older two children kept missing school.  Let's not even talk about how my pain STILL has not gone away!  Don't even get me started on how EVERYDAY (except two days?) since my delivery, I had been in the hospital SINCE his birth!!  I feel like I live there now!

Let's not even forget this:  I will not know I am completely over the post partum severe preeclampsia or the meningitis until BOTH are gone.  Both of them have the same EXACT symptoms (minus the spinal tap), and both of them have no "cure".  You get over both naturally, and both have the same exact problems (ie: headache, etc).  So, now, I was in a waiting game.  I had another appointment on 1/31/14 to see if I still need the continued use of my BP medication, but that is all.  Apparently, all I could do is lay in bed to get better and avoid the hell out of my kids.

All of this could have been avoided if I had been diagnosed while pregnant for the severe preeclampsia and if I had been diagnosed the FIRST time I was admitted into the ER (or if that nurse had worn a face mask!).  But, hey, I guess us normal humans know NOTHING about our bodies...right?  Just another reason to hate hospitals.


Side note:  If I had decided to breastfeed the minkey, he'd have contracted meningitis from me within days and put his health at serious risk (it can be fatal in both adults and infants, if not causing serious unrepairable damage).  So, I happily told nurses in the Medical Ward this fact, as soon as they started in on how I wasn't breastfeeding or if I just wanted to *try* pumping for a little while.  One newbie 24 yr old nurse, tried to start her shift by saying "Well, you do know that breastfeeding..." before she was elbowed by her older colleague.  I guess her senior nurse even know to shut the fuck up at that point.  LOL  Man, where is some people's common sense?!  While I had already decided NOT to breastfeed before all THREE of my children were born (after probably TOO MUCH research on it), the meningitis just gave me another reason for me to be VERY happy with my decision.  It was also another way to shut up the stupid boob nazi bitches, 99% of which did NOT have kids of their own.



Update:

My son is officially 3 months old today.  He loves me to death.  I get recurrences of the headaches, light sensitivity, back pain, and hip pain when I get any type of cold.  I also get the recurrences when I don't sleep at least 16 hours.  I am not kidding.  I have been told that it will be like this until at least another year.

When I originally wrote this, I did it because I had a horrible time REMEMBERING shit.  I had to have sticky notes all across my bed, in order to remember to do things or things that had happened within the last fifteen minutes.  I still have issues remembering things.

I have put candles in my dishwasher, when I meant to put them in the sink.  I started the dishwasher, trying to remind myself to wash those damn candles in the sink...then I walked away.  Came back an hour later, and realized what I had done.  We had to pay $234.00 to fix just the sink.  The dishwasher is still broken.  Sad thing is...we JUST had to replace our stove AND this dishwasher was only a year old.  It originally cost $800.  Ouch.  I cried about this one.  My husband took it in stride.  He just held me and told me everything was going to be okay...and that I'd get better soon.

I put my kids' toys in the washing machine, when I meant to put them in the bathtub to clean.  One toy got lodged into the exit pipe and we had to dismantle the entire machine to get it out.  It is currently duct taped and jimmy rigged back together.  Luckily the washing machine was very old and we were thinking of getting a new one eventually anyways.  It still works, but makes a hell of a noise when it spins.

I cannot begin to explain how crazy it is to live in my head sometimes.  The forgetting drives me nuts.  I'm almost always forgetting something.  I have always had to keep to a strict schedule, but I could deviate the plan sometimes..now...I have to have the kids babysit me and I absolutely can NEVER change my schedule.  It's almost like everytime I do something new or different, I can't retain it.  The retaining new information usually only starts to act up when I am starting another recurrence.  I usually last a week or so in between episodes like this.  I have mini-episodes, but nothing as big as the ones described above, usually everyday.

I AM going to therapy but all they really do is walk with me and tell me to repeat my day for them.  I don't understand why I do this.  It isn't working.  Otherwise...if I get told one more time that I need to be patient and that I'll get better on my own eventually...I might kill a doctor.

So, as I am writing this, please be VERY cautious with your health in the future.  God help anyone else with spinal meningitis.  I just want to get better....sometime...



Update #2:

I have been relieved of my therapy.  My therapist claims she can do nothing else for me.  My doctor said that my memory issues might be permanent.  The only thing that they did for me in the last month was to put me on an even higher dose of my pain medication (for when I relapse).  It is still hydrocodone, and yes...I am STILL allergic to it.  I avoid it at all costs.

I still have a lot of memory lapses.  Nothing major like candles in my dishwasher.  I use sticky notes and three calendars for important things.  The kids or my husband remind me about the rest.  It is a terrible feeling to feel like you are crazy.  I will think I tell someone something, but really didn't say anything...or I'll think I *want* to say something, but instead I forget to actually say it.  I even forgot my son's birthday...and he was just born!  Geez.  I also wind up calling up my sister like 50 times, because I forgot to tell her something and will remember later.  This is my own form of therapy.  I am trying to lessen those "call backs" or rather "oh, wait, I forgot.."  So far, I think it is working.

My husband says there have been some funny moments though.  His number 1 on the list happened recently.  I was painting pots for the girls' classes at school (Mother's Day gifts), and he suddenly pauses the show we are watching to ask me how the pots are coming.  Naturally, I'm all like..."They are fine? Why?"  He goes: "Well, because you've been picking up the same pot, seeing it's done, putting it back down...then picking it back up again...for the last 30 minutes."  Oi.  I didn't even notice until he said something.

My hip has started to act up when I recur.  It mainly just locks up a little bit or starts to hurt.  I can still walk though.  That is awesome.  I have the light sensitivity down to about 50% of what it was, and the headache/migraine/back pain is down to 75% of what it was...when I recur.

As of now, I am being told that I need to GAIN weight to supposedly keep my blood pressure in check (it might also helps with the recurrences).  I have tried everything.  I currently weigh 108.8 lbs.  I am being told to get my weight up to 120-130 lbs.  That is not only almost impossible for me (at my fattest I only weight 127 lbs WHILE 8 months pregnant...), but when I recur...I CANNOT eat. When I get a cold (any type), I physically try to force myself to eat...but it doesn't sit right for me.  I end up usually not eating the entire time I am sick.  Even now: I eat one meal a day, and that is with my forcing myself to...  So, I am essentially LOSING weight.  Sigh.  I've lost 3 lbs in the past month.  I've always weighed in between 90-110 lbs (usually), so this is a HUGE feat to ask of me.

ALSO!  Here is a biggie.  I actually DID tear VERY small during my delivery.  The doctor just didn't tell me.  She didn't stitch it either (she should have!!!).  So, by the time everything was all said and done...I now barely have a taint.  Awesome.  So, it went from a tiny tear into a massive tear and there is really no fixing it.  Although, it has helped with my bartholian cyst issues...as I don't need the numbing shots anymore to drain.  The cysts drain on their own without the shots now.  Yay for that, I guess.

My mother is doing a lot better now that they are feeding her again (Doctor Hyldal is amazing).  For some reason, they just straight up stopped taking care of her from End of Nov - End of Jan.  The original entry into the hospital where she was supposedly dying?  Nope, just bronchitis.  Nurse Cathy at Logan Nursing and Rehab had the nerve to call my entire family (even people who hadn't of talked to my mother in over 5 yrs) and let them know that I needed to start preparing a funeral...I'm not kidding. It was fucking bronchitis! It also scared the shit out of everyone.

I reported the nursing home to Adult Protective Services.  I think this is why they are suddenly more invested in my mother's care.  If I could send her to another nursing home, I would.  My sister is trying to get time off to drive from WVA, to out here....just to get her out of that place.

The little monkey sleeps almost all the time now.  He smiles and giggles a lot.  I did notice he doesn't make a lot of eye contact with me.  He loves my youngest daughter the most, probably because she hangs out with him all the time.  My eldest is terrified of holding him, but she is slowly getting over that.  He sure is a talker though.  He still hates his feet being touched and he dislikes belly time.  That kid will probably take forever to walk, but I'm okay with that.  I'm letting the little man do his thing.

My final update?  Well, it will get better.  There is nowhere to go but up from here.  It can't possibly get any worse...hell, I almost died for fuck's sake...and here I am.  (I really am tired of hearing all my doctors tell me how amazing I am doing compared to how I was during the meningitis phase....I'm also tired of hearing: "You almost died!"  No shit.  Still alive though.  Still breathing!)

My new philosophy on life is this: I don't have time for stupid shit or stupid people.  I'm being more outspoken about the bullshit I see.  Hell, some asshole let their kid slam their car door into my car (outside of my kids' school)...and I even yelled at them! HA!  Usually, I'd let it go...not anymore!  Can't wait to move! I'm also using moving as part of my excuse to be a total asshole to the jerks around here. (This made me a new friend in the parking enforcement officer at their school, he's a good guy and totally agrees/complains about the same things.)



Update 7/6/2014:

I decided to update this, mainly due to the bitch below that commented.  I do still have meningitis problems.  Thanks for almost killing me, shit nurse #1.  It took 5 months to become active again.  Active as in, watching my kids nonstop and dealing with summer vacation.  The memory issues are almost gone.  I still get a LOT of headaches and backpain.  I've been on hydrocodone and sumatriptan since.  I have to split the sumatriptain in half due to the side effects (mainly throwing up and the nose pain).

As per my meningitis, the shit nurse #1 wound up infecting all three mothers giving birth that day (myself and two others).  One mother infected her son (we all gave birth to boys), and her son died.  Mine lived because I was diagnosed by a competent doctor RIGHT AWAY, and she FORCED them to admit me.  The last mother that was infected, was treated almost immediately while still in the labor and delivery recovery room.  That shit nurse #1, took someone's child away from them and almost killed me.  But, hey, I shouldn't be such a bitch right?  It's ALL my fault that shit nurse #1 infected three different people and potentially their babies?  Riiiiiggggghhhhhttttt...

I would like to clarify some things, mainly for the bitch below.

I didn't handle my care.  My husband did over the phone (due to not being allowed to see me).  I had over 27 seizures (before the nurses stopped counting) and was almost completely out of it.  These are MY memories during some of my lucid moments.  (Some others were actually quite pleasant) My husband, my REAL doctor, and the medical ward doctor handled everything in regards to my care.  I only had about 4 requests, and I made sure they were adherred to. (Soda, ice, dark room, closed door, medication)  In fact, the nurses LOVED that about me.  I was considered a SAINT patient.  I knew what I wanted and would need - would ask for it during a shift change, then promptly go back to sleep or get on skype with my kids.  I didn't bother the nurses for unnecessary things.  I didn't use the call button unless absolutely necessary.  I especially didn't treat them like shit.  (Did you know during a shift change they actually introduce themselves to you?  That is where majority of my interactions came from.  99% of the shift changes were with good nurses.  There were about 4 total nurses during my meningitis stay that were terrible...and coincidentally that was on the last three days I was there.)

Mentally, I was NOT all there during my meningitis trip.  It took 2 months to become fully aware of my surroundings again.  I know for a fact that my husband is polite and very nice (100000x better then I am).  He did not have any problems while discussing my treatment with the DOCTOR.  He had ZERO contact with the nurses.  But, caught me, my husband and I were total assholes to them right?  Even though I was mainly asleep for a full two weeks and recovering?  Uh huh.  Totally MY fault that I was infected and recovering.  God forbid I want to recover quickly!  God forbid I make sure that I am not a bother to anyone.  (Hell, even when I went home...my husband was surprised at how easy it was to take care of me)

I did drop off some cupcakes later for the GOOD nurses that were entertaining and generally nice.  You know, the ones that actually gave a shit about me.  There was about 10 total and I even got a card in the mail from them.  Thus, I labelled each cupcake with their names - so no one that didn't deserve one could steal them.  I stood in the hospital for about 45 minutes, handing them out.  They all got to see my minkey, and hold him.

The good nurses were fantastic.  The bad nurses should be fired.  They would come into my room when they were bored, and just talk to me or hang out with me sometimes.  One of them admitted that they were avoiding another patient and that I was easy to take care of.  Mainly I just joked around with them and didn't get personal at all.  I knew that I turned a conversation personal, I would start to cry because I missed my kids so much and I was absolutely miserable.  Thus, I kept my personal life out of the hospital until I asked the newbie male nurse to see my mother.  Hence, I started crying.  Everyone was actually really scared that I started crying because before then, I had been a happy go lucky patient.  Easy to deal with.

I don't know if the bitch below understands this, but when people hold their life in your hands...you're not gonna be an asshole to them from the get-go.  In fact, during all of my trips to the ER - I tempered everything I said and was VERY polite.  Not a one of them knew that I didn't like them or what was really going on inside my head.  Not a one.

I followed the rules (and made-up rules from other idiot nurses) due to either wanting to be released within a set time frame, or wanting to just get better and go home to my son.  Do you even realize how difficult it was for my family that I was in the hospital and recovering so long?  I missed out on A FULL MONTH (at least) of my son's LIFE.  You've gotta be fucking kidding me!  There is NO EXCUSE FOR WHAT HAPPENED TO US!  (Go ahead and try bitch)

Do you know that when you are in  labor or being admitted half-dead, that you are more likely to be NICE to the person that handles your care then to be a complete bitch?  Obviously the RN bitch does NOT know this.  I didn't show up to the hospital a complete and utter bitch.  I showed up looking for treatment and what I got was anything but that.

Essentially, I was mainly only there for the medications during my meningitis trip.  If I had known what I do now, I would have asked my doctor (the one that MADE them admit me) to just prescribe it to me and get better that way.  Instead, I went through all kinds of loop holes during labor (I should have just delivered at home!!!) and a ton of bullshit through my meningitis.

I did NOT deserve the treatment I received.  I deserved to be respected (as bitch below doesn't seem to understand), and to be treated like a HUMAN BEING.  Instead, I was treated like a teen mother (go figure, I actually look like a teenager...) and like a complete idiot.

In case the random people out there come across this post, the hospital I was treated at was: Intermountain Medical Care in Logan, Utah.  There are tons of stories like mine.  Google it.  The nurses and ER doctors are notorious for NOT doing their jobs.  They rarely diagnose you with the correct illness and just try to get you to "go away".

For the record:  I am absolutely positive that there are fantastic nurses out there.  I have met some of them.  However, my meningitis trip and labor were completely tainted by the evil nurses that should never be practicing.  As it seems, it looks like the bitch comment below should also not be practicing.  Her words alone not only generalize nurses (way to group them together!), but they also treat the PATIENT who has LEGIT complaints like shit.  She should not be allowed in medicine and should have her license revoked.  I hope someone finds out who you are, so I can report you to your boss and the medical review board.


I also find it laughable that you think you save lives.  You don't.  The doctors do that.  You can't even change the medication bags without approval from the doctor.  You do NOT save lives.  MY DOCTOR DID.

If you become attached to every patient, and every nurse is told this (I have a friend that is an RN here) then you will quickly "burn out".  So you are actively told NOT to get too attached.  You are told to do your job respectfully and quietly.

Bitch below me seems to have a REALLY high opinion of herself.  All those things you mentioned?  Those are all bullshit.  Even if you do come across a nurse that REALLY cares about you, she/he did NOT save your life...she just made your stay more enjoyable rather then utter hell.

Yes, it seems like out of 100 nurses here...only 10 were good.  But, that's the roll of the dice.  I posted my issues with how I was treated (numerous visits) so that OTHER people are WARNED.  Our healthcare industry is slowly going to shit, mainly due to the attitude of bitch below me.  When you are half-dead, (I didn't even handle my care for the most part, my husband did...as I couldn't focus on anything during my 27+ seizures) you are looking for HELP.  Not to be treated like dog shit.

You are not looking for someone to interject THEIR personal views onto you.  You are not looking to be harassed for paternity tests, bilirubin tests, POAs, and a slew of other things.  Majority of what I was harassed for is NOT the hospital's policy, that is why I wrote it all down.  It was a personal DECISION that the nurse (at the time on shift) MADE.  When your life, or being discharged, is in a nurses' hands...you do everything you can to "abide by the rules"...but at what point is abiding by the rules too much before you have a right to complain?

None of what I went through is acceptable treatment of a patient.  It is downright disgusting.  Breaking policies, making life harder just because you can, forcing your own views on someone, purposefully ignoring the patients REQUIREMENTS (IE: My husband holding my son first)....none of this is PROFESSIONAL and none of it should have happened at all.

Did you miss the part where my mother is 100% completely mentally incompetent, and the nurse dragged my mother's foot through gravel?  My mother can't even speak!  She required stitches to close up her wound, and to this day her foot STILL looks like a mangled mess.  Did you miss the part where she called people, whom she doesn't even know, to tell them I needed to arrange a funeral?  Hello?!  First off, that is NOT caring for a patient.  Secondly, WOW...that goes beyond patient confidentiality.  Thirdly, I AM HER POA!  She had NO RIGHT to call my entire family and let them know something so asinine.  It wasn't even true!  She inflicted all kinds of emotional distress with her actions!  That is actionable!  But...you know...my mother showed up being a bitch, thus she deserved that treatment, right?  (No, I was already admitted into the hospital and didn't even know she had been admitted until much  later...but you can try to blame ME on that too, bitch.)

Well, mine was after I got out of the hospital ("prison").  I complained my ass off to everyone that would listen.  If you are going to treat someone like shit, then you deserve to have the patient's OPINION directed right back at you!  (But...you should be nicer, we're saving your life!!!!)  Bull fucking shit.  You should be nice to ME.  I am paying for your fucking salary, bitch.  You want respect?  Then give some.  You don't get respect immediately just for going to college for two years.  You get respect when you treat someone like a HUMAN.  Not when you treat them like you're a total bitch.

PS.  You're still a bitch and this is my blog.  So get the fuck off it.


Update 8/8/2014

I am only updating this so that people know that Intermountain Medical Care in Logan, Utah likes to double dip.  My insurance company (Tricare) has paid them, yet they tried to send me a bill four times now.

The first time I was very patient and even grabbed both cellphones in the house.  I called Tricare on one of them and the hospital billing on the other.  I MADE them speak to each other.  The hospital billing apparently put in the wrong code (it was for labor??) for my meningitis ER visit and spinal tap.  It was fixed, supposedly.

The next two time I received a bill, the hospital billing claimed a note would be left in my file and all would be well.

I received another bill this past week.  I will admit that I am officially fed up.  Tricare has paid them.  Yet, they are still trying to bill me for THEIR over billing? HA!  I called the Tricare first, and they say a check was sent/cashed.  That there is ZERO patient responsibility, thus I shouldn't even be contacted about this.  I decided to call up the hospital billing, and inform them that if there was a problem - they needed to do their job and speak to Tricare, not come after me for any supposed money.

The first woman on the phone gave me filler comments.  "Oh, a note will be put in your file.  Put the bill to the side, just in case you need to handle it later.  We'll try faxing Tricare again, or you can call them yourself.  But, this seems to be a problem on Tricare's end."  Uh...I'm not doing your job for you.  If YOU have a problem with Tricare, it is YOUR job to contact them and figure it out.  Tricare has already paid you, it's illegal for you to over bill and to come after me for any excess money.  I'm not a middle man, and I'm done getting run around in circles.  No, I will NOT put the bill to the side when it is ZERO patient responsibility.

Apparently, none of that was getting through to her.  I had to demand a supervisor. She refused to get one for me at first, until I stated the federal law that REQUIRES her to get one for me upon demand/request.  I did get a supervisor.

I had enough time to calm down.  Obviously, this is one of the many reasons they keep you on hold.  To calm you down.  I explained the whole situation to her...know what she said?  This is not the bill from labor and delivery (no shit), but from the actual doctor (Doctor Greene) who admitted me into the critical ward and "did your spinal tap".

I will admit, I flipped out at that point.  I said, "Oh really?  The same doctor that sent me away the first time with a hormonal headache?  The same one that told me Google doesn't have all the answers, even though my REAL doctor called ahead to have me admitted?  The same one that could NOT get my spinal tap in and (my later awesome doctor) another had to step in to take me down to the spinal tap MACHINE to get it done right...  The same doctor that REFUSED to admit me a second time until I had a seizure right in front of his face, and even then was hedging about it?  The same one that called out by said awesome doctor and told to get his shit together?  The doctor that shouldn't have a license?  Right, even if I had to pay for this bill...you just dug yourself deeper.  I won't give that man ANY money of mine even if I did owe it.  He's lucky I'm not suing him."

I did record the supervisor part of the phone call.  I didn't really let her speak after she mentioned said shitty doctor was looking for double dipping money.  I want everyone out there to KNOW, hospitals attempt to double dip ALL the time.  They get money from your insurance that is a FAIR rate (federal rates that can't be changed), then when they realize their prices are too high...they try to annoy and harass patients for the remaining.  This is illegal.  You shouldn't put up with it.

Sadly, I know this happens at Intermountain Medical Care in Logan, Utah...as this is now the 3rd time I am having to deal with this.  Obviously, I don't have the patience anymore to put up with their illegal bullshit or their fucking lies.

Edit:  Obviously, if I really owed the money I'd consider paying it...but I'd take a long ass time paying off the $300 just to be a bitch.  My attorney says that I have enough to file a law suit against the hospital and the ER, but I am hedging on it.  I have a lot going on and that could take years.  We're also moving soon.  So, eh.