Military Budget Cuts

http://money.cnn.com/gallery/pf/2014/03/12/military-wives-budget-cuts/5.html#

Wow! I am surprised at some of these comments. I have been a military spouse for over 15 years (most of it has been fun, even though there are some serious downs to it all), my husband is active duty army. He has been deployed THREE times since my oldest was born (so let's nix the rumor that people don't get deployed more then once, okay?), he is currently preparing for yet another deployment. We have 3 children ages: 7, 5, and 2 months.  My home is currently in upper UT, and he is currently in TX (third place he's been to without us).

We used our VA loan to buy a house here four years ago. We bought it in the winter, never buy a house in the winter!  When the snow melted, we realized a huge mistake: our property was a DISASTER (the inside was made to look pretty, but had major faults too)!  We were massively hoodwinked.  We have spent thousands just trying to FIX our backyard and make it proper so our children won't get lost in the 6 foot tall weeds that have prickles.  This isn't even HIRING anyone, it is strictly on just weed killer.  Did you know that wood mulch can actually mold?  Did you know that voles are actually a real thing?  I mean...voles...not moles.  They are a mix between rats and moles.  They hide in my garage during the winter and eat up my lawn, that I slaved to make into grass and not a jungle.  Seriously, our house was known as the jungle before we moved in.  Not because the grass was overgrown, if only.  It was the WEEDS, rusted metal, random debris...you name it.  I've had to fix it by MYSELF, yes, I even replaced a toilet by myself the FIRST week we moved in.  I even put up our massive fence by MYSELF, I did NOT hire someone.  No, my husband did NOT help me.  My neighbors just called the fire marshall and cops on us every week (no kidding).  (My neighbors are also VERY anti-military and would egg our house or destroy things like decorations for kicks.)  I *finally* have the yard where my kids can play in about half of it with no issue.

My husband was relocated to another state after 15 months (came as a big surprise to us, as we had been here over a year already before he was relocated), and my family remained behind in another state (to keep the house and so my kids could be stable). We currently have the house over an hour away from ANY base. Sadly, he was sent here to fix the recruitment out here...but we can't even grocery shop on base because of it.

We've tried to sell the house, but the housing market is just terrible! They are also building even more houses right around the corner from us, and ours will barely sell for how much is left on the loan...if it sells. Who wants a used house when they can buy a brand new one right around the corner? We should never have bought a house. It was our biggest mistake. We just wanted to have a stable home for ours kids, and it backfired massively onto us (so did the property tax increase this year).  We are praying that we will break even after all of this time.

I am a freak when it comes to clipping coupons. I save money everywhere I can. We didn't have TV in the home until about 3 years ago, we'd watch TV or movies online. We didn't just scrimp, we worked our butts off.  Even some of my friends, that I've made out here, have been surprised at how much we try to save money.  It's been a real reality check for them.  We've actually compared pay stubs and bills with each other.  I have given them a LOT of tips on how to save money.

When the paychecks weren't keeping us afloat, I'd apply for jobs. With a degree in criminal justice and one in technology, you'd think I'd be a prime pick right? I also have over 20 years of experience in sales/retail. Over the past 5 years, I have been denied a job over a dozen times due to my military wife status in this very tiny college town and these aren't even GOOD jobs.  They were all min. wage jobs, and VERY labor intensive (aka fast food etc).  I can't even get a job in one of my fields, because hey...we're military.  We won't be here long.  Sure.  Uh huh.

Even while owning my own house here, I was denied because they saw me as "unstable". Military spouses are labelled before they go in to get a job. The ONLY types of jobs I could get were at McDonald's, which I have worked there before and kept the job as long as possible, because hey..it's a job! Do you know how many times I have seen the glazed over look as soon as I say I am a military spouse, and that explains why some of the jobs I have had...didn't last longer then a year? They treat you like a horrible person because you "followed the job". That's how it works in the military, so stop holding it against us!

Aside from the stigma attached to military spouses, do you realize how much child care costs nowadays?  It cost me $700 a month for just ONE of my kids to be in daycare, because I HAD to work.  The cost of that alone was enough to take over majority of my paycheck.  Thank god, he finally got a pay increase and I could stop working for a while.  Don't even get me started on after school babysitting, either.  Those fees are enormous here, too.

I was working 39 hours a week at McDonald's, because otherwise the company would have to make me full time (way to go screwing me with that!).  I was working my butt off, AND taking care of my kids solo.  Do you realize how difficult it is to get a job that will be flexible around your kids' school schedule?  That won't fire you for your kid getting sick at school, and you having to go get them?  (Yay for fire at will states!)  I was sleeping four hours a night, just to get extra hours in...so that we could have more money floating around.  I was like a zombie.  I didn't get sleep, worked my butt off for a small paycheck, paid bills, and took care of my kids.  I couldn't even hold a conversation for more then 5 minutes with teachers before I'd start to fall asleep.  I did the McDonald's thing for over a year, that's how dedicated to my family I was.  Even after all of that work, I was only making about $100 extra a month for us.  Gas, child care, etc...too much to work.

We scrimp and save every penny, so that he can SEE his kids 3 times a year. It costs $400 for just gas and four full days of travel (back and forth). He also pays $200 a month plus food, electricity, and gas for a ROOM in another military family's house. Even if he was living with us, it'd only be about $350.00 extra a month...but I DREAM about having that extra cash flow.  I DREAM about him being here with us 24-7, like a normal family.  (I really need to sell this house!)

My kids DO have a skype relationship with their father, and all of them have since even before we bough our house. I have been a single parent for the last 7 years, and it hasn't been easy. My kids basically see my husband as the "fun uncle", even if they call him "Daddy. He comes home or tries to punish them, and they just don't respond.  They see him and love him to death, but know he has no authority over them and just go nuts!  Oi vey.  That is the hardest thing for me.  To see my eldest KNOW that Daddy isn't EVER there for her, is VERY hard.

I have always had to save up for things for MONTHS. Birthdays, Christmas, Halloween costumes...are all saved for and stockpiled starting every year in January. I start in January, scrounge for coupons, wait for deals...and then buy it. I get EVERYTHING dirt cheap when possible and store it all in my closet for MONTHS until it is used for whatever holiday.  I have become impossibly good at sewing, which I've always hated.  I make things for my girls like clippies, headbands, dresses, jeans, and pjs just to save money.  I used to sell the extra on ebay, but even ebay is so outrageous and shipping charges have increased so much that I can't do that anymore.  I don't think my kids have EVER had brand NEW outfits EVER.  We shop at thrift stores or I make them.

We have little to no debt. We've never been on food stamps. We were only on WIC one time for two months while pregnant with my eldest. It was a horrible experience. I will never do it again. I checked this past year, we didn't qualify for WIC by $50.00 a year, we STILL qualify for food stamps. No kidding. I will not sign up for any of it.

It IS possible to live the military lifestyle with kids, IF you cut a lot of other things out. We have a garden that I tend to every year, and I save wherever I can. I can foods like a crazy person (I even make my own apple butter).  If we are simply not "up to snuff" on bills, then I cut another "luxury" out that other families of the middle class here do have, or attempt to get another job (almost impossible in this town, child care cost me more then I was making last time I worked at min. wage). Jump zone? What is that? Cellphone? Prepaid only. No cable bill until recently. Coupons for groceries. Points from groceries used on gas for the car. Thrift shops for clothes. Craft stores for extras.

When I compare my own kids to other kids at their schools, or even on play dates, it is very obvious who the spoiled brats are and not just because of the parenting styles being different. My kids can be brats sure, but nothing like these kids we've encountered. There is a HUGE difference between my kids and "normal" kids. I am actually happy about it for the most part.  I have taught my children the value of a dollar, and how to make money online.  I've taught them how to handle coupons and save money.  I've taught them how to save up money and never to get a loan (use cash, but slowly build up your credit!).  MY kids know what money REALLY means.  These other kids?  Nope.  Spoiled rotten.  The difference between mine and theirs is night and day.  Most of these kids here don't even have chores...can you imagine?

You want to talk about middle class families?  Well, they are living the HIGH life here compared to us.  Newish cars (mine is from 2005) that are car washed every week, brand new clothes and shoes for their kids, brand new toys for their kids - you name it: they have it, and do it.  I don't take my kids to jump zone, we don't eat out, we don't go ice skating, we don't go skiing, we don't go to the city pool...we have our "fun" at home.

To have a pay cut WOULD hurt families like mine. We are the families that scrimp and save, don't have 5 kids, aren't overweight, and aren't even using the benefits available to us. We are the families who have seen MULTIPLE delpoyments, relocations across the world/states.  (Granted, mine is bad mainly because we DARED to buy a house like a normal family would do)  But there ARE military families out there, with one kid or two..and they are struggling for YEARS.  WE struggled for over 10 years.  I cannot imagine how much harm a pay cut would hurt them, it'd cause so much devastation.

Yes, I am married to the military.  I accepted the good and bad, that's why we worked our butts off to have what we have.  However, that doesn't mean we should take a pay cut in stride.  Do some of you posters even realize that majority of active duty members, barely make over min. wage?  Obama is effectively cutting our budget AGAIN.  I don't blame the military lifestyle.  I knew what I was getting into when I signed up for it.  I did NOT know that our paycheck would be reduced via the government.  THAT is why people are upset about it.  People get angry when someone is effectively trying to steal your money.  We barely make a living, and work our butts off (some of us anyways) to make sure our money is used the best way possible.  To have it taken away JUST BECAUSE we are military?  That is a slap in the face, and a punishment, for something that we didn't have a hand in.

PS.  To "justagrl", your children having a relationship via skype is NOT about "quality of time" vs. "quantity of time".  It's about attempting to be a normal family and NOT being a single parent.  My children would probably just die of joy to have their father around 24-7.  I doubt you have children, if you did then this wouldn't even be mentioned.  TWO parents are always better then one.  To any parent out there, it KILLS you to see that type of relationship.

We have lived all over the world, too, but my kids were WAY too young to even remember any of it.  The point to that comment would be?  Our "trips" are my husband coming to see his kids.

I have worked those jobs, I have budgetted since we got married, I have dealt with life as a military spouse...because I signed up for that.  I did NOT sign up for Obama to steal my husband's paycheck.  If we weren't military, he would NOT be stealing our paycheck...but because we are...I'm supposed to just suck it up?  I don't think so little girl.

Also, I don't feel these spouses or ANY other spouse is blaming the military, lack of planning, lack of employment, lack of social needs, etc.  We are blaming the government.  We are blaming the very same people that our spouses fight for.  Most of us EXPECTED a lot of things that came with being a military spouse, and if we didn't...we learned real quick in this "sink or swim environment".  Don't act like this is all about people who can't plan for garbage.  It's really not.  It's about someone trying to STEAL even MORE money from us...

Do you even realize that in OTHER countries their military are the highest paid workers...and in the US we are the least paid?

Whatever...if they budget cut, our family will adjust.  Like we always do.  Just don't be surprised when no one wants to defend this country anymore because it's not "worth it".  In this day and age, everyone has mostly agreed that it takes TWO paychecks to be considered middle class.  We are surviving on one, and it's about to be even less.  We are not supposed to be happy about this after all of our MANY sacrifices.