Accosted By Charities and Being Treated Like A Child

The other day I ran out of eggs to make my daughter some cupcakes for her birthday.  She requested these cupcakes specifically, and stupidly, I forgot to check and see if I had eggs.  So, making an afternoon run to the grocery store was required.

Mind you, I usually only go to the store during the early morning weekdays or late as fuck on weeknights.  I hate the traffic and I REALLY hate the patrons.  Don't get me started on the many stories I have of other parents little snots or other people acting like complete assholes.  Plus, it was going to take me an HOUR just to get a thing of fucking eggs.  I was not happy, but I got the leave the kids at home with Dad.  (Phew)

I know I look young, but I'm actually over 30 years ago.  Without my kids in tow (and most of the time even with them), I get comments the most random obnoxious comments from people.  Let's see, when I was 25 yrs old, and my daughter was 1 yr old...I was being attacked at stores for being a TEEN mother.  Huh?  Even after correcting them and sometimes (just to be an ass) showing my license....the comments never stopped from these people until I was WAY out of their line of sight.

I get pulled over for a random traffic stop, every month, for the past 3 years here.  I almost always get asked if my ID is fake, and should I really be driving at such a young age?  Eh?  Want to see my Military ID?  Here you go.  Want to see my license?  Here you go.  It's never enough for these types of ignorant people.  I even carry my birth certificate with me, always.  (I keep extras at home, just in case I lose any of my identification)

I smoke and drink.  I get carded at EVERY restaurant and gas station.  No matter what.  My husband, is almost NEVER carded.  God forbid, once I even left my ID in the car and I showed a waiter my Military ID instead...that was a shitstorm of managers, etc, telling me they do NOT accept a federal ID.  My husband offered to get my ID out of the car for me, but by then they weren't having it.  We were eventually informed that my husband can drink, but I cannot.  Nice.  We haven't been back to that restaurant since.

Aside from strangers, we live in a small-ish town.  We've been here quite a while now (5 years).  The same people that card me every time, are the same people EVERY time.  I'm really not kidding.  I know where most of the LIVE.  Ugh.

Anyways...back to my story.

So, I park my massive kid carrying SUV and go to walk into the front of the grocery store.  I do briefly notice that the boy scouts are looking for donations.  They had some cheap table set up, two kids, and one adult.  I'm not sure what they were selling, aside from asking people for money.  From what I can tell, they were being quiet and mostly not bothering people...until they saw ME.

I must have a sign on me that says: "Harass this chick for donations!!"  Instead of letting them just go on my merry little way, the adult tells the kid to stop me.  I  hear this, but ignore it...hoping they don't mean me.  The kid stands directly in my path and starts harassing me to donate to the Boy Scouts.  I'm not interested.  I barely have enough money as it is, being on a military pay grade and all those massive bills, so I politely tell the little shit that it's not gonna happen.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see the adult do this shooing motion.  I basically run to get around the kid and go inside.  Thank god that's over with.  Get my eggs, check out, and prepare myself to go back outside (I even called my husband and was speaking to him while I was leaving).  At this point, I am hoping they don't remember me or just leave me alone.  Not.so.much.

I guess they were waiting for me to come back out?  I walk out the door and almost get tackled to the ground.  Not only is it one kid, but both of them, AND the adult blocking my way now.  They start telling me that I NEED to donate now, and if I don't I'm an evil person going to hell...or some shit like that.  I look directly at the adult and say calmly: "I am on the phone.  If I WAS interested in supporting your cause before, I am no longer interested.  Let me pass."  This does not work either. 

For a good 5 minutes, I have all three of the shits trying to coerce me into donating.  Their comments ranged from, "If you can't donate, then your parents will DEFINITELY donate."  Um, what?  My parents are pretty much almost dead, why would they care to give their even smaller amount of money to your cause?  Why even bring my parents into this?  (Yes, these 2 kids and adult thought I was like some 16 yr old...)

Finally, when I see a glimmer of an exit...I take it and run.  While I'm going across the street, I hear the adult say: "If she can afford a a cellphone, she can afford to donate!"  Of course, this makes all other people walking past stare at the evil woman who refused to donate to the Boy Scouts.  Nice.


My second donation attempt story:

I was hanging up a ton of Halloween decorations in my house, about two weeks before Halloween.  The particular ones that I was doing that day, were actually in my front bay windows.  I was pretty much teetering on the edge of my couch, window open, trying to hang them up in the windows.  Not a great position for me, especially in PJs.

So, I'm basically hanging out my window and trying to hang up random Halloween decorations into the window.  I was one inch from falling, so I'm trying to hurry for my own safety, and I see this woman out of the corner of my eye being followed by a brood of 6 kidlets.  She was walking up my driveway with her entire brood, waving at me through the window.  (Creepy)

I do wind up falling off the couch when I see this bitch coming up my walkway with her brood.  I actually hit my shin really badly on the metal part of my couch, so I was limping.  I open the door slowly (don't want the damn dog to get free), and she proceeds to start introducing herself to me.  I've been living here 5 years now, why are you just NOW introducing yourself to me?

After she introduces her entire brood to me, she tells me the REAL reason she is annoying the shit out of me.  Well, didn't you know?  She could see me setting things up for Halloween, and just KNEW it was the best time to catch me...because I am elusive.  Her words, not mine.

She wants me to donate to her family, because her middle child has child diabetes.  This kid is 100% healthy, and the type of diabetes he has is non-serious, and non-life threatening. Type 1, meaning he will need to take insulin the rest of his life...but he's not DYING like she tried to tell me.

Yes, so she brought her kids with her to try to guilt me into donating for her well-to-do family.  Yes, she has more money then we do.  She admitted to getting over $100,000 last year for her family because of her child's "condition".  /sigh.

I told her that I'd have to ask my husband, and get back to her.  Which ensued the conversation about how we can just put a check in her mailbox.  Okay...right...  I totally copped out and blamed the husband later, but in reality...neither one of us gave a SHIT about this woman's problems.  Especially since she specfically didn't introduce herself to me UNTIL she wanted money from me.  Fuck that.